A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My best friend has now got a boyfriend and she now treats me like crap. I just dont know what the hell to do.When me and her are together were happy and laughing and enjoying life and university but then when she gets home and gets online to talk to him suddenly its like im public enemy number (excuse the swearing) ******* one! She hates to talk to me and will only say one word answers, either one of these three. Meh, yes and no. Also she lies to me about whats happening, i have to initiate contact of any kind and if i do shell only say two words. It just seems like when hes around theres no use for me, i love her to bits and only want whats best for her but its really getting to me now. I just wish shed treat me like at least a normal human being. Things were fine before he came along, we would talk and play online, chat on the phone, all would be well. But now i dont know what to do or say to her, i just want her to be happy, am i being selfish? It feels like it.
View related questions:
best friend, has a boyfriend, she lies, university Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2008): Hey there peeps, thanks for the advice, it really means alot to me that its not just me thats got the problem. I have tried having a night for just the two of us but she cant be naffed because "hes" online or on the phone. I do love her to bits but she just wont communicate. I will try to do as youve all said, this should be fun eh? heh.Cxx
A
male
reader, jay12toes  +, writes (6 June 2008):
 iv been hurt by this befor too. my best friends old gf hated me and so we could only hang out when she was busy. the best advise i can think of is make a night out for you two, one day that she can tell him she will be busy hangin out with you, its not selfish to ask for one day every week or two.
...............................
A
female
reader, bubbloo24  +, writes (5 June 2008):
 I've been in this situation, have you tried talking to her?
Sit her down and say "You know I'm always here for you, I love you to bits but something is upsetting me and I want to talk to you about it. I don't blame your new relationship - I have nothing against it, but I'm feeling upset because I feel like i'm losing you" Maybe you could talk about a few nights a week when you can have girly nights/days and go out?
Don't say "you are" or "he is" because she can't blame you for the way you feel but she CAN blame you for accusing you and her actions.
If this talk doesn't initiate some kind of change and she carries on the way she is doing at the moment, what more can you do? You can't say you didn't try.
Go out and spend time with other friends, the liklihood is that she and the new boyfriend will drive themselves into a very lonely state with a very bad social life and will end up getting quite fed up of each other - creating a very inhealthy relationship.
If she's upset however, make sure you're there for her and if they split up, be there for her again. She'll need you more than ever and she'll realise what she nearly lost.
I've been in your friend's position and this is what my best friend did, I felt and still feel guilty about pushing her away when a boy came into the mix and I have made sure I haven't done it ever again.
I hope this helps.
Take care xx
...............................
|
