A
female
age
41-50,
*PAK
writes:my husband and i have been together for 8 years now. we have always been the kind of couple that went out to social events together, whether it was with his friends/family or mine. in the last year he has not joined me to most social events that i've invited him to and now he is telling me he wants to go to out sometimes to his friends gatherings without me. I feel hurt and suspicious of his new behavior and wants. am i wrong to feel this way? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, bouncer  +, writes (28 August 2009):
I SMELL A RAT. I think your husband is up to no good. Believe me i know about this shit and all the signs are there. Trust your gut fellings on this it is seldom wrong.I hope i am wrong for your sake but it does not look good
A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (28 August 2009):
 Hi,
you are not wrong at all to wonder about your partner's sudden change in social habits.
Obviously the first thing that crops into your head is ,is he spending time with another woman. Every woman who has been cheated on will tell you there are tell tale signs of this. So look for a change in your lovemaking habits etc.
But you might also have to ask yourself some tough questions: ie. have you changed a bit yourself? are there friends you dont like seeing anymore which your husband does? Are there certain things you both dont share in common anymore? I'm only saying this because you may just be developing different interests and he would rather do things by himself than drag along an unwilling partner.
Alternatively, he may just be liking the independence of spending social time without his partner. A lot of couples do this and have perfectly healthy relationships.
At the end of the day his social activities have changed, and you deserve an answer from him. If he is evasive mention to him that all this does is create suspicion. You could compromise , say you dont mind him going out by himself but you would like to be included on other occasions as well. This in turn would give you time to develop your own social activities with your girlfriends.
It doesnt have to be all bad,but you do need to find out if it's something more suspicious. If he won't be honest with you I admit it's not a good sign.
Good luck.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2009): just sit down and talk to him about it. if you dont got any open communcation than there is no point in being married or dating. you need to talk to him and tell him your worries and your change in a marrieage for a year now. he also needs to be honest with you, that is one thing that you deseve is honesty and that is one thing that helps a relationship work out more in the long run than as lying to the person and not saying anything
...............................
|
