A
female
age
36-40,
*ly84
writes:Hello everyone thanks for taking the time for reading this. Let me try and make this short. I've been single for 2 years now. I was previously in a 5 year realationship. But found out the whole thing was based on a lie. So now its hard for me to trust guys and since then I have a very low self-esteem hate everything about myself I'm really short like 5 ft and I have gained like 40 lbs over the 2 years. I've been really depressed. I've gone out with guys but I seem to push them away. But I recently reunited with an old friend, which he was my first kiss. We haven't seen each other since we were 13. Now we're 26 year olds. He looks gorgeous like OMG HOT!! he's tall like 6ft 2in skinny and very athletic. Well we hung out twice and both times we made out. But I'm so insecure. I have a feeling he has a gf. I asked him if he has a gf he said no I asked him several times and he would tell me he doesn't that we are both 26 year old adults we can do whatever we want. But see we only hang out in the night, when I txt him he takes long to answer me. I have been in this situation before I don't want to get hurt and be the other girl. I know how it feels to be cheated on.Well he has asked me if I would ever have sex with him. I tell him I don't know because I'm not the kind of girl that just has sex with guys just like that. I've only been with one guy my ex and thats about it. But I mean I do have needs and there are times I feel like I need to have sex. And well I do feel comfortable around him when he kisses me, I've never been kissed like the way he has kissed me but, I'm thinking he only wants me for one thing. What should I do.. Should I get my needs taken care of? But since I'm on the heavy side I don't want him to see my body. I'm ashamed of my body its not like I haven't tried excersise and diets or anything I have for years I've always been a big girl. So I don't know what to do. Plus its been 2 weeks since he last called or txt me. Do you think he has a girlfriend as well. He has told I need to make the first moves too.. On our first date he said he's done 75% of everything he asked for my number he called and he asked me out. So now I gotta do my 25%. So what should I do? Please I need advise on this.. P.s. And thanks again for taking the time and reading.. Plus its my first time on here..
View related questions:
depressed, has a girlfriend, insecure, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, ironman777  +, writes (18 May 2011):
Hi - I think you should go for it with this guy, after all you are 26 yrs old and you can make your own decisions. When a guy says that he is not involved and he calls you and he is interested I would take him at his word - yes he's thinking about making passionate love with you, but I think that if you gave more of yourself and put aside your fears more but also said that lets just enjoy kissing and getting to know each other first, he will understand and if he really likes you then nature will take care of itself eventually and once you have sex with him well thats brings a new level of intimacy to it. I would also say that it doesnt hurt to say that you would like to have sex with him at some point and leave it at that - you dont have to say when just that the thoughts are definately there. Remember he will have some of the same doubts in his mind and wondering if you like him also.
Good luck!
|
