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Not sure if he likes me 100%....to initiate or not to initiate?

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Question - (1 December 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 1 December 2009)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I have a friend who is helping me talk to the guy I like and he doesn't know its my friend. He told my friend he wants a gf but he feels its difficult to get one. He mentions girls he rejected, my friend asked if any other girls liked him and he said there wasn't....so...so far I'm not in his "avoid" list but then he hasn't mentioned anything about me at all...In my opinion I think he likes me because of the way he has been acting around me for the past month or two, when he sees me he will flash his teeth look at the ground and back up still smiling big and then rush past me, and he repeated something like that everyday for the past month and his friends were laughing out loud at him when he does those things...he looks like he wants to talk but chickens out every time.

Anyways, he told my friend a girl shouldn't do too much approaching a guy, and if she really had to talk to a guy then just talk like regular friends. I was planning to talk to him and tell him i like him, but after he told my friend that i'm not sure if thats a good idea..not sure if its ok for me to do that...i don't want to scare him off by asking him out. But my friends situation was that she didn't know the guy at all so thats what he suggested, but as for me and him, we kind of talked like 7months ago, i guess i made a mistake to ask him out then, but after we came back from summer he seemed to be more interested in me, but is still afraid to make a move. What should I do, school is out very soon, I'm not 100% sure if he likes me, and by what he told my friend i'm not sure how to approach him...he said a girl shouldn't initiate too much, but then I know that he is not really an initiator either or i should say at all....so how does this work????

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2009):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I want to talk to him, but i haven't seen him for a couple of days....I hope he is not avoiding me..

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2009):

TALK to him yourself, or he'll like your friend

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A female reader, Aunty BimBim Australia +, writes (1 December 2009):

Aunty BimBim agony auntI really believe you need to approach this man for yourself and leave the friend out of it.

He sounds like a lot of hard work, are you sure you want to persist?

You need to do your own approaching, you dont have to be full on, a friendly smile, a simple question, just let him know you are there and willing to talk and socialise. See where it takes you, and if he does turn out to be a candidate for the "too hard basket" you will be able to just move on.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (1 December 2009):

You need to start talking to him. Your male friend is right to an extent, but I'd say that it's worth taking a risk and at least asking him out to do something with you. If you don't you won't ever know the truth. Take a risk, try speaking to him and see where it leads. He might like you, but might be shy or confused about how you feel.

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