A
female
age
30-35,
*alu
writes:hey,I'm doing this boot camp thing this week because my boss/instructor wants me to do it. and he has pulled out all the stops to enable me to do it as well, so much so that i am now staying with him and his girlfriend this week at their house.this in itself is not a problem. the problem is that I have no idea how to behave when staying at someone else's house, especially when it's my boss I'm staying with. I mean I know the whole thing of 'be polite, always use manners' etc. I follow that as much as humanly possible, what I mean is that I don't know how to thank him for his hospitality. and I tend to walk on egg shells, afraid I'll do something wrong or irritate my host. but after a week of that I fear that he will be irritated by the fact that I tend to walk on egg shells all the time..I could just be worrying unnecessarily (if you haven't noticed already, I tend to worry a lot haha) but any advice may help calm me down a little hahathanks in advancehalu xx
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female
reader, cupidus  +, writes (24 April 2011):
 Cool, as long as you are safe.
A
female
reader, halu +, writes (23 April 2011):
halu is verified as being by the original poster of the question thankyou for both your advice, it was much appreciated.
i stayed at his anyway, (i was given the spare room, it was very nice actually) 5am starts all the way!
it wasn't as bad as i thought, i relaxed a bit, played some Xbox with him. i was just over reacting.
the reason he pulls out all the stops for me is that he's high expectations of me. he's also my instructor, and he wants me to do well. and to be fair, this week has improved my martial arts so much, it's almost unbelievable.
i trust him quite alot, but i can say no to him, it's not like i hang off his every word or anything like that. and the reason i had to stay at his was because i couldn't stay anywhere else, i couldn't afford a hotel and i don't know anyone else who lives in the area. and the place where we were doing this boot camp doesn't have insurance to cover accommodation.
so it ticked all the boxes really, also i think the fact i was staying with me meant that i was more motivated to complete the course, because i was also training in the evenings, i reckon i was close to burning out this week. but anyway.
yes thankyou for the advice again, sorry for the rather long monologue about the week. but there you go
halu xx
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A
female
reader, cupidus +, writes (17 April 2011):
Your insecurity which may drive a low self esteem is what worries me when adults take children under their wing.It makes them more of an authority figure and thus they have more control over your emotional as well as physical life.That's not a good place to be standing. Also the fact that your boss insists and has pulled all the stops. What is that all about? Why do you have to live at their house? I'm suspicious already! You should maybe have more questions for them about this arrangement, or go to another boot camp for girls only or another gym. I really don't want to be hearing about you on Nancy Grace. You should investigate this more.
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A
male
reader, mrg123 +, writes (17 April 2011):
 You are worrying too much. As long as your not planning to trash the house during the stay, from what your saying here you obviously have basic common sense and basic sense of manners. Your partially right that if your on edge it could lead to problems because I dont know about your boss but id pick up on it and it would start to grate me a little. It will also mean if you handle some treasured crockery your more likely to drop it through nerves. Whats the solution? Simple. Chill out and be yourself, you will find your nerves will most likely melt away in any case after a couple of days. It's often the case that the prospect of something is more nerve racking than doing it. I for example, hate public speaking, but when i'm doing it I get into the flow and the nerves are gone. Your boss obviously rates you highly to give you this chance so just take comfort in that and have fun!As regard thanking him and his GF maybe you could buy them a small thank you card? I'd make sure its addressed to both because obviously your boss has given you this opportunity but his partner is also accepting you as a guest. Dont forget to include her in the thanks. Good luck, dont worry so, it will be ok!
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