A
female
age
30-35,
*aisy92
writes:ok so if you have been keeping up with my other questions you will know the whole story but if not i will make it a 'long story cut short'ok so i am in a lets just say 'rocky' relationship and i have now wound up pregnant. i have just turned 19 so in my oponion i am waaaaay to young! like i would trash about the girls who became pregnant in their teens now i am. my boyfriend still does not know that i am pregnant as things with him in himself arent so good right now as i think he is a alchoholic and doesnt treat me so good at this present moment. Ok so not only am i against teen pregnancy i have been brought up in an extreme religious house hold therefore i am totally against abortion and i just keep thinking "i cannot kill my baby!" but on the otherhand i am so not ready to be a mom and as for my boyfriend being a father? no way! This baby would be better off bringing its self up. i just dont know what to do! any help?
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female
reader, Maisy92 +, writes (6 July 2011):
Maisy92 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThankyou all, i have still not decided but just had my first scan this morning and i am 13 weeks pregnant. I told my bestfriend and she is so supportive but i am still unsure this is going to change my life in so many ways, its telling my boyfriend which is the first worry.
A
female
reader, EtTuBrute +, writes (6 July 2011):
 Personally, I had an abortion at age nineteen and it was the best decision I ever made. I felt a huge relief after the procedure. There are a lot of children in orphanages already so I felt bringing another one into the world wasn't fair. Despite what others say, abortion isn't the worst thing in the world. Though, you must do it within the first few weeks.
By the way, your family doesn't have to know if you don't want them to. My family knows nothing about it, but I had my boyfriend for support. Please at least tell one person that you can trust and know won't judge you... No matter what you choose. You're going to want someone to be by your side.
Adoption is a good choice if you are not okay with abortion. You could have an open or closed adoption. There are a lot of couples that want babies and can't have their own.
No one can judge you for your decisions, besides yourself. You may never be 100% sure about the decision, but try to do the best thing for you and the baby.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2011): I would abort it, have you seen the rates on kids that actually enver get adopted? Or how life ina group home is?
If they get send back with their foster families they are denied new clothe/school/books money for the next year as punishment for being returned, like they are a piece of furniture.
If I can find a good fmaily that would take him I would give him...have u seen those girls in 16 and preggo that find catalogs of couples looking to adopt kids? Do that. Find a family, interview them, meet them and if u like them then go. If not abort it. really. A life and not being adopted is really really hard. Please find a fmaily of him./her FAST!!! and a good one, make sure of it!!!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2011): Give the baby for adoption!! So many couples wanting to have a baby. Your baby will be a blessing for them!!!
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (6 July 2011):
 i think adoption is the best idea too.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (6 July 2011):
 adoption
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (6 July 2011):
 I agree with 'the realist'. It is obvious you are not going to have an abortion as it is against your beliefs. But if you know deep down in your heart that you are not ready to be a mother and that you cannot provide for the baby well then adoption is probably the best way to go. At least you know your baby is going to a loving family who will provide for him/her and give them the best possible up bringing. You do need to talk to someone about your options though, because after giving birth it can be very hard to let go so you need to think things through and ask yourself is it really what you want.
I think you need to talk to your boyfriend sooner rather than later. Tell him you are pregnant and see what his opinions of it is. It may also be good for you to talk to your parents and tell them about your worries. I know you may have always looked down on teenage pregnancies but am sure now you can see how easy it can happen. Talk to a trusted adult and also make an appointment to talk to your doctor and just discuss your options.
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A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (6 July 2011):
 You could give it up for adoption. If you act now there you can have a family ready to adopt. This way you understand that the baby will be in a good home and it should be completely fine in terms of religion.
It shows that you understand you may not be ready for this baby but still want it to have a good life with a family who otherwise may not be able to have children of their own. In my opinion it is one of the best things you can do for another family and the baby.
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