A
female
age
30-35,
*eowmeagan
writes:My boyfriend and I have been dating for over two years and the sex life has always been really good and frequent, usually once or twice every day. Lately he hasn't wanted it as much though, (like only 3 or four times a week) and he told me it was because he didn't want it to be an expected thing, just having sex every morning and night, then repeat. That he wanted to keep it special. I know I should probably just think that's fine, I understand, but is it worrisome that he used to want it all the time and now not as much? Should I think its something else?
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male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (1 February 2012):
 lucky bastard ;)... nah he juss wants to enjoy it more with you. Its not getting dull he just doesnt want too much of a good thing... and besides holding off here and there can create some good buildup and maybe even provoke some wee creativity.
A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (1 February 2012):
Hi there. Are you living together? Or, are you just seeing each other every day, and both live with your parents?
As you have already been together for over 2 years, you are probably now getting past the honeymoon stage or "Newness" stage, so it's settling into a new stage of your relationship.
That's completely normal - whether you are dating or married. Regardless of your ages.
If there is an expectation by you, to make love every day and night, because it's always been that way, well then there is a sense of performance to live up to, for him. Or there could be, with time.
And with an expectation to perform when he may not be in the mood, then there could be some anxiety for him.
And that could lead to impotency if you're not careful. So be mindful of that.
3-4 times a week is still pretty frequent.
A lot of relationships after 2 years or maybe 3 years, are down to on average about once a week. And that's often about fairly normal for many couples of all different ages.
So 3-4 times a week is probably not so bad.
It's not that he loves you any less. It's more that your relationship is maturing and evolving with time, as all relationships do - without exception.
Just so long as the quality of your lovemaking is still very satisfying, that's the main thing to keep in mind.
And as long as he is still treating you well, takes you places, spends money on you, and doesn't take you for granted, you are probably doing okay.
So if you are generally pretty happy when you spend time together, you are not always fighting, and you can sit and talk about anything and everything, it doesn't seem there is too much to be concerned about.
I wish you both well.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2012): If he still wants it 3 or 4 times a week, I wouldn't worry about it at all. I think that what he has told you his reason is the truth., I honestly don't think you have anything to worry about at all.
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