| A
female
,
*rincess1andonly
writes: I'm a 19 yr old. I have been with my boyfriend sixteen months. I'm curently on nuvaring a birth contol viginal ring. However I have no libido. I have no desire whatsoever. What could be wrong with me?
View related questions:
libido, no desire Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Love_ee  +, writes (30 August 2013):
I have been off the nuva ring for several months and still no libido nothing! Its depressing because its also what makes you feel attractive. I thought once i got off the nuva ring i would be back to normal but its been several months now... I dont know if its stress from work but i had blamed nuva ring... Idk if its normal after a while
A
female
reader, Elizabeth87 +, writes (1 March 2011):
You are not crazy nuvaring complete depleted my sex drive as well, stop taking it! It brought my estrogen level into the 20s and I started hot flashes and premenopausal symtoms @ 30. I had better luck with the pill. Nuvaring took my ability to orgasm away, now I'm on HOrmone replacements, after numerous doctors. I wish that everyone knew the truth about nuvaring. Say bye bye sex drive.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2009): Hi there I have recently experianced the same thing I took nuvaring out and had nothing and I went back to normal then used yasmin and I an in same situation I have no drive at all nothing but I read an article in the paper and it suggested to get blood test and doctor can determine what you are low in and correct it I am getting this done now let you know how it goes
Rachel
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2009): Every woman who has this low libido is suffering from a looooow level of testosterone. There is a testosterone creme you can rub on your wrist once a day, I know a doctor who 's testosterone was at 0 and after a few days the creme started working (like soo fast) and she was noticing guys, checking them out, and just started to feel herself again! As far as libido goes...I have two small toddlers and yes mine has dropped noticeably as well.....The stress of them being on you night and day makes your brain shut off making testosterone so you purposely don't want to have sex and have more babies.....I have never done the pill so I don't think it's the pill unless that of course makes more estrogen/less testosterone (which I think it does) then the pill would also do it.
Cjeck put the creme, ask your obgyn for it.OR read Suzanne Somers latest book about it, she's a litttle far out but pretty right on with most stuff, has definately done her research with great docs! And definately UP on women's health issues. Just buy the book and look up stuff, you dont have to read it like a novel......
Remember there's nothing wrong with you or your partner or your marraiges...it's ALLLLLL hormonal!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2008): Wow, I came to this website to see if there are others like me and it is a relief to find it is so! I am 42, so much older than the rest of you, but I too, have no libido. I have been married for 10 years and same partner for 15 years. My husband has a very high sex drive and wants sex a minimum every 48 hours. Right now I can care less about it and sometimes I get upset and repulsed when he touches me in sensitive private areas.
My husband is a great lover, very kind in bed and everything, but I have no desire. When we have sex, there are times I just want to get it over with. I have been on birth control pills for 20+ years, currently on Ortho-Tricylen generic, so hopefully that has something to do with my low libido. Oh, I also have two young children. I use to be passionate and enjoy sex very much, but now can't stand it. It is becoming a problem in my marriage.
We don't even have any other major marriage issues, great lifestyle, good income, fabulous kids, love doing things together, great 'couch time', etc. etc. He is incredibly bright and socially stimulating. I also find him physically attractive, but just not sexually anymore.
He recently had a vasectomy, so now birth control shouldn't be an issue, but I am worried my libido will not increase again. Especially after reading all of these responses for those that have stopped oral contraceptives and still no desire. I will keep you posted if libido returns after I stop this last month of pills. I just don't know what to do to increase my libido. I actually miss it very much and pray it comes back. Thanks to all.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2008): Same here. I was on Yasmine for a year and I had a moderate libido, then I stopped cause it made me gain a lot of weight. After 7 months I started again, but this time I got breakthrough bleeding for 6 months (so not much sex in that period). Then I switched to Microgynon 30, and ZERO libido. But it doesn't make me spot or gain weight, so in that sense it's good, but I hate that I don't have a libido, and I feel so bad for my partner.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2008): hi!i am 27 years old. been on jasmin for 8 months. my desire has dropped to almost zero. i have tried multivitamins and ginseng - which didn't help at all!!i stopped 1 month ago and nothing came back .i am frustrated. dont know what to do!!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2008): Hi all
it is some comfort to me to find people with the same issue.
I used to be one of those girls with an extra healthy libido...and now i have NO desire whatsoever!!....i almost have an aversion when my husband tries to touch me. We have been married for almost 15 years and over the last 7 years it has been decreasing to the point that now i just dont want to do it at all!! I have never used the Nuvaring or been on pills. I do have a two year old daughter. Since i had the baby my libido has totally disappeared! I feel really bad for my husband, and god i have tried but i almost feel like crying while we are doing it. It has no pleasure. Its creating a really bad tension between us and i'm scared that either he may cheat on me or just leave me. Its weird cuz i love him sooo much. i just dont feel like doing it anymore!!!! Dont know what to do!!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2008): I am switching off Nuva ring because of this as well, but it makes me fell...gross. I feel horrid when i have sex, and i have to make him stop. He is worried about me coming, and i dont want to suddenly deny him sex completely. I just dont want anyone of thing (including myself) to touch me down there, any where, even my legs. age 19
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2008): Feel in the minority here, maybe it would help even 1 couple if shared with you a males perspective. Having being left by my ex wife for another and having a non existant sex life due to her being sexually abused as a child. I thought i had landed in Heaven when My new partner also had a high sex drive. We decided to try for child being as we already saw ourselves as a family as she already had 3 kids from her previous relationship. Predictably her libido dropped significantly during birth. And for 12 months after hormones and PND and other reasons could explain a loss in her sex drive.
our little girl is nearly 2 now and my other half still has zero sex drive, with my other half not being pro active in finding a reason .I have been to hell and back being given an ever changing aray of excuses and reasons imaginable. i have been emotionally destroyed and left feeling unattractive, unconfident, angry, desperate, paranoid, jealous and used. Both of us at some time have blamed ourselves and each other and i have to confess with my pent up sexuall frustration we have ended up in severall (non physical)escalating visciuos circles which end in her ordering me to move out.
Haveing more to loose than just a partner and with swearing on my own life to my little girl that i would always be there for her. i can honestly say if it wasn,t for our kids i am sure we would now be miles apart. what i am now open to, after reading this thread is that only weeks after my little ones birth my GF was "fitted with the coil", and we were told this should stop her having her periods she still has very unconsistant periods and her moods resemble being possesed, i am now curious if this is contributing to and is a possible cause of our lack of intamacy and deteriation of our relationship.
Please to all ladies in this predicament, please remeber men have hormones too. and as a red blooded male keeping tabs on your temper whilst dealing with sexual frustration is a feat in itself. I can vouch for one its a horrible and darkand lonely path to have to walk. forgive your guy for the things he has said in temper and remember if he's still with you he must love you an awful lot! my advice would be- Be Patient and as Open and Proactive to this problem with him as you can. I wish you all every sucess at relighting that fire within or the strength and patience needed to get you both through it.
i think medicines and physicians have a lot to answer for I,m of to investigate this some more.....Mr hopefull!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2008): I'm 21 years old, on Ortho Tricyclen, and am having the same problem. It's extremely frustrating becuse I used to be one of those girls who had a higher-than-average sex drive, higher than most guys I knew. But now my libido is gone and to put it simply, I miss it. I don't feel like the same person, I don't feel sexy (maybe due to the 10 lb. weight gain?!). Anyways, I hate being on the pill. But when you think about it, the pill (or ring) truely is a great form of birth control: You have no sex drive so you don't have sex, and you can't get pregnant unless you have sex. Presto! I think that's the real concept behind birth control! But ladies, when you think back to the good old days when you did have a libido, when was the one time of the month when you wanted sex the most? Just before your period when you were ovulating, right? It was like you could suddenly feel your body change and all your senses would stand on end! But birth control makes it so you dont ovulate at all, which can have a direct correlation with your libido. I mean due to the birth control, our bodies are basically telling us we're already pregnant so there's no biological process going on that's saying "get pregnant now! Here's an increased sex drive to help you make sure it happens!" Dispite the fact that it's a crappy situation, it makes sense that us women would lose our sex drive since they no longer ovulate. (While our boyfriends just get to keep enjoying the ride and spend less money on condoms...)
...............................
A
male
reader, sobeit  +, writes (24 January 2008):
I am a 27 year old male who is in a 3 year relationship with my girlfriend. she has lost all of her sex drive. it is the only problem in our relationship. I feel like a sexual freak whenever I am around her. She has no interest in sex at all! NONE. I feel horrible and so does she. I can not understand what it feels like not to want to have sex. Even if I was not in the mood I would find a way to do it just because I love her. It is to the point where I am about about to break it off. I can't spend the rest of my life having sex a few times a year.
She is great to me, treats me so good. However, I feel like I want to burst through my skin because of all this sexual tension. We live together as well. It is to the point that We sleep in separate rooms because I am so stressed and feel unwanted... What should I do?
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2007): I am also 19years old, i have been with my partner for 2 years and been living with him for 6months..i have NO sex drive at all, i dont have any urges for it, and its just a horrible circle as i feel down that i'm not ''normal'' especially when i hear my friends are ''at it'' all the time, and when ur down u dont feel like having sex. i have no idea what to do?! we have been having unprotected sex for 8months now as we were trying for a baby,but with the lack of sex, i'm not pregnant. it is so frustrating, i keep wanting to go to a pyschosexual therapist or a gp, but i find i quite embarrassing. my partner has a very high sex drive, and we are going through a really bad part in our relationship because i have no sex drive, and he thinks i am not attracted to him and that i dont love him.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2007): I feel the same way. I am a 27 year old married mom of 2. I used to have such a high sex drive. I was very into having sex and felt the need for it everyday. I have had no sexual feelings for the past 6 years, ever since I got pregnant with my first child. Sometimes I think it is my husband because he is not sexually experienced at all. I have tried getting him sex books and dvd's on how to arouse women, but he just blew it off. It has gotten to the point where I don't even masterbate anymore. I can't even give myself an orgasm. I have absolutely no desire and I now think sex is dirty. I would rather sleep than have sex. I am very frustrated by this and hurt. I wish I could feel the same. I want things to change but now I'm thinking maybe it's just me and not my husband. (We've never had a good sex life. Before becoming pregnant, he wasn't exactly "top gun" either. He is smaller than average.) After having 2 kids now I think maybe it's just hormones and my body appearance isn't the same so I don't feel sexy anymore. I don't know what it is and i've talked to doctors and they say we have to rekindle the flame. I think that's a load of crap. I think it's hormones. If you're only 19, no kids, no worries, then I would see a doctor. Maybe it's your partner? Maybe it is old and boring now and nothing exciting? Maybe that's my problem, but I have no idea and it's affecting our marriage where I think either he or I will oneday have an affair. I think it might be me because i need to know if it's him or me.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2007): Hi,
My story is very similar to yours. I have been with my husband for 7.5 years and have had little to no sex drive for 4.5 years. It has come to a head today, unlike other times, he really is angry about it all today and has vowed not to come near me ever again. Says that I have destroyed his confidence and made him feel like a sex pest. I feel so guilty as he has been really patient with me. The whole thing upsets me so much. I have tried herbal pills, counselling, changed the pill, everything. My doc checked my testosterone levels which were very low and has put me on testosterone tablets but after 8 weeks I have not noticed a change so today I am doubling the dose. I keep telling my husband that we now have an answer as to why I feel like this but its gone too far now. Even if I do get it back he will be thinking I am doing it for the sake of it.We have 2 young children so tiredness and stress are not helping. Can someone please tell me how I can save my marriage, I feel like such a freak and such a failure. I wish I could be a proper wife and lover. Any advice would be gratefully received. Thanks
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 October 2007): HI all.
I feel so much better about myself hearing that other women have no libido. I have a sad tale to tell. I was with my partner for 7 years had a house etc.... but i had zero sex drive. It made him so unhappy thinking i did not love him. Eventually i plucked up the courage to tell all to my GP. I was almost put on anti-depressant tablets saying my low libido was for this reason. Nothing could have been futher than the truth. I was feeling low as a result of not wanting sex and thought i was a freak. The relationship eventually crumbled under the strain and we went our different ways. He said if my zero sex drive continued he was worried about being tempted by other woman.
I had a break on the pill for 10mths but it never returned. Met someone else who is very special and thankfully due to his busy lifestyle sex is not top of the agenda to him so i feel less presure. I went back on the pill and just recently stopped 2 weeks ago. I think im getting the "urge" now for sex but not wanting to get pregnant just yet. So.... what do i do? go back on the pill and be frigid again!!!? condoms are a big no for me by the way? can anyone relate to my letter? any one found a pill that makes them want sex too? would love to hear from you! x
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2007): I'm 22 and just recently started on the Nuvaring and am having the same exact problem - just absolutely zero libido. I was on the pill for 3 years before I started on the ring and did not have this problem, so I was really concerned when all of a sudden I just lost any desire to have sex. I'm glad that there are other people experiencing the same thing - it makes me think that is must be something to do with the ring.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2007): I know this has been said already but it really is great to hear that other people are having the same problem. I am 24 and have been on Nuva ring for about 18 months and six months ago I lost my sex drive entirely.. When I tell people that I have lost my sex drive they are shocked! This is so not like me.. My Dr. really feels that the dosage offered in Nuva ring should have no effect on my sex drive.. I hope I find an answer soon..
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2007): i must say, i am extremely against the pill.. i was on it for about a year and a half (when i was about 16/17), and just like nearly everybody else, i had NO libido whatsoever.before this my libido was extremely healthy, but suddenly I become moody, irritable, couldn't think straight and had a no time for sex or any such thing. after about 2 months of not taking the pill, my libido came back. and stronger than ever (haha), and it's remained that way since...but seriously, i think it's really sad that no one's drawing attention to these facts. i can't believe the amount of stories i've heard/read about relationships that have been destroyed because of the pill... not only because of the decrease in libido, but because of the depression too. and to top it off, it's really inconventient and costly to not be on the pill.all in all, the whole situation is a catch 22.i just hope more people become aware of these issues.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2007): Oh my GOSH; it's nice to find people that I can relate to that are having the same problem as me. I was on the same bc for 10 yrs (ortho tri-cyclen) then just switched to Loestrin FE and NOTHING. I still have absolutely NO SEX drive. My bf if VERY understanding but I don't like that I am like this. When we first met I was on the ortho and did have a sex drive, but was that only b/c things were new. After we finally did have sex, not too long after, my drive went down hill. I see what someone wrote about all women are different which I definitely agree and maybe I should just NOT take ANY pill but how come I have had a sex drive? Why does it come and go? Like in the beginning of a relationship and/or when my ex and I had broken up and got back together, one of the things he had complained about was how he felt unwanted by me and we didn't have sex. We had sex everyday that last month we were together, was I just able to make myself "want it" b/c I knew it was making him happy? I mean, I really wanted it. HELP!!! I don't want to try another pill, I can't take the spotting for 3months again. Has anyone experienced their sex drive coming back on Loestrin FE and/or after a certain amount of months on the new pill?
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2007): Okay, This is a post from quite a while ago, but I have to respond to the male reader that posted last. Please don't give birth control advice if you don't even know what "libido" is.......she has a serious question that needs answered and I think if she wasn't using protection I dont think she would be asking the question about her contraceptives. Please educate yourself a little before you respond to serious questions about these types of issues.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2006): you could get pregnant and then you will regert it for the rest of your life becuse you didn't use a libido. Even then your boyfriend could leave you because maybe he did not want to have a baby. Just be careful on whatever you do and get the libidio okay. It's only for the best. Take my edvice and do what i tell you.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2006): Although I find comfort in the fact that at least a few other women have noticed and experienced the same loss of libido that I have, I am disturbed to hear the lack of solution. I was on the ring for about 9 months as well and all of a sudden began experiencing significant pain during intercourse. I discontinued use of the ring and after a few months the pins and needles pain subsided, however intercourse still does not feel good and I have absolutely no desire to have sex. It has been over a year since I stopped using the ring and I have since switched to Lowess, however the lower estrogen pill has not revived my libido. I'm also starting to worry if prior ring use may have negative effects on fertility as well. If anyone else has any suggestions, they would be greatly appreciated.
-Sincerely, 26 year old in a sexually strained relationship
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2006): I don't know if you are still checking replies, but I was on the NuvaRing for about eight or nine months and totally lost my libido as well. I just switched to Desegen - a birth control pill - and it has miraculously come back. Try switching birth control methods!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2006): how to use female condom
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2006): I am also on Nuvaring. I also have ABSOLUTELY no libido. I have an emotional desire for intercourse but my body just does not respond. This has been hell on my relationship. Although my bf has been understanding, he constantly feels unwanted.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2006): You should at least consider the possibility that hormonal contraceptives may not be for you. New studies show elevated levels of Sex Hormone Binding Globulin, or SHBG, in women currently taking the pill as well as in women who were on it but stopped. How long SHBG levels take to go back to normal, or if they ever fully do, is unknown.
Women who respond to pills in the way that you do often respond to any hormonal contraceptive in the same way, trying nearly every brand on the market with no improvements, all the while increasing the total time spent on the artificial hormones. It's true that all women react differently and that not all women have these side effects, but I personally wouldn't try more than two or three other pills (if you must) before going to a completely hormone-free method of birth control. As someone who has tried three different types of hormonal pill over the course of seven years, if I could go back I would have discontinued the usage of the first one at the earliest possible second.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2005): Talk to your doctor, a lower dosage may help. I just switched from the shot to the ring and I am going through the same thing. All women are different, as are our hormones.
...............................
A
reader, communicatrix +, writes (17 September 2005):
 Speak to the prescribing physician. Hormonal birth control can have many adverse side effects, including loss of libido.
There may be a lower-dosage form of birth control that's more appropriate for you since, as I understand it, Nuvaring is a one-size-fits-all proposition, dosage-wise, and that dosage may be too high for you.
...............................
|
