A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Feeling really lonely:I, not to sound cocky, believe and truly feel that I am a down to earth, smart, attractive, fit, interesting, fun and caring. However it feels as though no one will ever love me or even look my way... I am still in high school so I tell myself "this is just high school! don't get so caught up it is such a small section of the population" But no matter how much I try it gets to me and I can't help but break down and cry. I smile in front of everyone, no one would ever know I feel this way. I go to a party and every girl has hooked (make out, possibly more) with a guy at the to party,,,except me. I go home and just want to cry. I've had boyfriends before but for two years I feel sad. really really sad. Everyone no matter how insignificant or meaningless has something but me. I have told myself it is because of so many reasons, but my self-esteem has taken a toll and I do not know if I will ever recover.I am going to college in 8 months and have all of these high expectations, like once I go to college where people haven't known me my whole life men will appreciate me and someone will see how cool and special I really am.But until then does anyone know what I can do to not get so down on myself every day? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI did have great friends & family as well as lots of hobbies. To me my life seems really well put together and great. But it mentally affects me that no guy is interested in me. Last night every girl hooked u with someone..... except for me and I just went home and cried for the longest time. I just do not understand. When I am out I am so confident in myself but nothing ever seems to go my way (boy, relationship, hookup).
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (29 December 2010):
When you're looking for a man in your life, you really need to plan ahead. You need to build your life up from the bottom so that when a decent guy comes along, he knows you're in a good place and he knows that you're a decent girl.
So rather than focus on getting the guy, focus on your own life.
How are your friendships? Do you have enough of those?
When you're alone, do you have several hobbies that you can do? If a guy asked you what you liked doing, would you be able to explain those hobbies? Would you be able to do them together?
How is your family life? Is it supportive? Do you do much with your family?
Build all these things up first, because they will make you happy, and in turn they will make your more attractive, because guys will prefer a girl who has her head in the place.
A lot of people of all ages assume that just by going out and finding a boyfriend/girlfriend, that everything will just work out and everyone will be happy. And it just doesn't work like that. At first, you might feel wonderful with a guy. But after the honeymoon stage has worn off, you need something else, such as those things mentioned above. If you don't have them, you'll lose the guy.
Don't worry about getting a guy right now. Focus on building your life up. Then when a guy does come along, you'll be the best girl around, and you'll have your pick.
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