A
female
age
,
*essi0303
writes:I am questioning my sexuality, i was married, i have 3 children but never enjoyed sex with any man that i have been with. In the past 5 years I have found myself wanting to be with women. Im not clear as to wether it is sexually but I am in my comfort zone when I am in with women. The emotional comfort more and more and i am abit afraid to take this further but I want to. I have had dreams about being with a women and fantasized about being with a woman while being with a male. Does this mean that I have been lying to myself all my life because that is what it feels like? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, jessi0303 +, writes (17 October 2008):
jessi0303 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your suggestions They are appreciated
A
female
reader, jessi0303 +, writes (17 October 2008):
jessi0303 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your suggestions They are appreciated
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2008): Oh, I see.. so you have always had an attraction to other women. Well, if that is the way you feel, then maybe it's time to do something about it! I'm not exactly sure how to go about this, but there must be a way to meet someone and see what happens. You should do what your heart desires, sweetie. You tried to be what you felt you should be and it didn't make you happy..so why not explore and see if that would make you happier. It's worth a shot, right?
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A
female
reader, jessi0303 +, writes (17 October 2008):
jessi0303 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI appreciate your comments, but i must have not made myself clear. I have been attracted to women all my life, but i went with the suppose to do life. I got married due to the family pressure because I got pregnant and stayed married for the sake of my child who then turned into children,trying to pretend we were the all american family. I am and have always been very close to my family, my mother is now best friend as well as my Mom. I have not missed out on any relationship growning up or as an adult. It isn't that I can not satisify my self or teach my ex- husband, there was no attraction and I would just get grossed out. Yes, I may have lied to him but I knew I was lying to myself more.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2008): One thing my friends and I used to tease each other about after one of us had a bad breakup was that we should become lesbians...no offense to anyone, but I've always felt that being women, we understand each other better right? Women are more nuturing, more caring, more sympathetic, just more in tune with each other. I think you are just very disenchanted and being with females you feel the comfort that men often cannot give us, just because its not normally in their nature to do so. I can't say whether or not you might have a tendency to be a lesbian, but I urge you to figure out where you are, and what you want. Like the other poster said, no one can make you truly happy sweetie, you have to do that yourself. Being with someone can make you happier, but if you aren't happy with yourself to begin with, you can't expect someone to do it for you. Take your time, and I wouldn't worry to much about your dreams. We can all have some pretty strange dreams that we never really figure out. I hope you find happiness, no matter what choices you make.
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A
female
reader, Serenity1 +, writes (17 October 2008):
 Well to be honest with you, I think honestly all people eventually have thoughts about the opposite sex rather they admit it or not. The point is if you act on it. If you have been with men all your life and have never been emotionally or sexually satisfied, you yourself play a huge role in that unsatisfaction. I say this because if you were close enough to commit to marriage you should have been able to tell that man that you were not being satisfied and be willing to work on different avenues to satisfy you.
Moreover, I remember having a friend who shared with me that she hadn't experienced having an orgasm and she was in her early 30's and had 4 kids. This is a result of not knowing yourself. When in time alone you have to get to know yourself then you can share that with others (women or men). But you can't expect another individual to teach you or satisfy you when you can't even do it yourself.
Sometimes women want to be with other woman because of the lack of a motherly figure they had coming up. Sometimes it could just be out of curiousity, but it all boils down to you seeking love. And I just hope and pray that you don't think a person is going to provide all that you need. Only God above can supply all the love that you need.
I'm not judging you I'm just trying to comfort you before you get your feelings hurt. Because even after you fullfil this fantasy that you have with this other women, you still will not feel complete. I promise you that. Hope this helps.
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