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My wife has a new sexual fetish. Is this normal?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (3 August 2010) 10 Answers - (Newest, 4 August 2010)
A male United States age 51-59, anonymous writes:

My wife likes me to lick her bum. This seems weird to me, and i am not sure i like it. I do it. This is hard to explain, but she seems to get off on dominating me. She says stuff like, "You like it when i F your face, don't you" or "lick that ass"

She does this by starting in 69, which she initiates. Next thing i know she has raised up from my stuff by extending her arms, and is basically sitting, rubbing, and thrusting herself all over my face, going from her front bits to her bum, while my hands are pinned at my sides. I can't say I really like doing the actual act itself. It is kinda exciting for me to witness her loosing herself in sexual pleasure though.

Is this weird? Do other wives/girl friends ask or force their husbands to lick here? I would be so embarrassed if she ever told anyone - it just made me wonder if other couples do this. Is this normal?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2010):

If she wants to to lick her anus you should use some sort of hygiene protection, like an anal dam, to stop spread of bacteria. Perhaps you could bring this up with her, and then it might be more pleasant for you, as well as getting her to think about what she is doing.

But, if you are not happy doing it, then DON'T. Make that clear. You should do things that make you uncomfortable.

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A female reader, StrayTogether.com United States +, writes (4 August 2010):

StrayTogether.com agony auntIt's quite normal for both men and women to enjoy a bit of anal stimulation during sex. It's also normal for both sexes to hesitate about doing the licking.

We can infer from your statement about having your arms pinned that this is what makes you uncomfortable, but you haven't said outright that THIS is the part that gives you discomfort. Many people are uncomfortable because they fear the area is dirty. If this is the case for you, consider asking her to take a shower beforehand or, better yet, initiate taking one with her before you're intimate. Then you can be certain the area is clean and lie back and hopefully enjoy the ride.

If the arm-pinning, control-taking part of the activity is what makes you uncomfortable, I agree with the others saying that you should just talk to her about it.

Fondly,

Jill

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A female reader, tennisstar88 United States +, writes (4 August 2010):

tennisstar88 agony auntSo she wants you to toss her salad so to speak? I thought most guys had an obsession with the woman's ass, I guess i was wrong. Well at least she's not in nylon fetishes or asking for a golden shower. I had a boyfriend forever ago toss my salad and i wasnt into it. I asked him nicely to stop. I would just explain to her that it does nothing for you and explore other options..maybe watching porn during sex, although sometimes its cheesy, I like to dress up, a nurse, naughty schoolgirl with a ruler, french maid...etc

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2010):

I usually have to ask THEM. Consider yourself lucky, and nose in there and do your job! THat's good stuff right there chief!

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A male reader, BrownWolf Canada +, writes (3 August 2010):

BrownWolf agony aunt

Dude...Where can we guys get clone copies? If the sexual fetish is just for you...enjoy every last lick.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2010):

well she probably saw it from a porn site or heard about it and wanted to try something new with you. If u dont like doing it then let her know. but if it turns you on then do it at your own free will and not because u feel forced.

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A female reader, cocoqueen88 United States +, writes (3 August 2010):

cocoqueen88 agony auntyes it's normal people do it all the time.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2010):

What others think or feel about this is hardly important. If it works for you, it's as normal as it can be. You say you like it too, although you don't seem very convinced, possibly your moral hang ups are in the way. Try to think only of the act itself with no hang ups or such. It's called annalingus and more common than one would think.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2010):

"You like it when i F your face, don't you" You like it? If so, then what's the problem?

Actually this is a bit on the rough side and out of the ordinary... but, hell, so what. If you don't like, tell her that. Or use it to get her to do things you really want her to do.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2010):

Relax and enjoy is all I'll say. Most men complain that their girlfriends are open or adventurous enough in bed - seems like your girl knows what she wants.

If it makes you uncomfortable then you should let her know but I'd suggest you just ask her to reciprocate (ie she can lick your bum) that way I'm you can at least be safe that she won't tell on you.

But really man, it's all good, my wife asks me to do it every once in a while.

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