A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am 31 I’ve been married for almost 4 years and I known my wife for 6 years and we have a beautiful 3 years old girl, and we have a second one on the way, but I have learn something very horrible and I do not know what to do, I truly love my wife and my family A few days ago I was cleaning my house up, my wife and my daughter was at my wife mums house, when I find a tape, it called wedding, and I put it on, wanting to see mine and my wife wedding we had, I remember feeling really happy at the time, but when I put it on….It started a little weird, first thing I saw was a bed, then voices and it was my wife voice, I knew right away, then two people came in front of the camera and it was my wife with a guy and after a few minutes I realize who the guy was, it was her ex-boyfriend, the one she was with before meWhat I saw and heard after… the guy said to her “did you drug your husband like we said” and she said “yes I have, he sleeping in a different room” then the guy took out a condom, but the condom was filled with sperm and he said “put your wedding ring in this condom filled with my sperm” and she did and she put a rubberband around it and put it between her breasts, I fast-forward it, I saw them kissing, she sucked him and it ended up both of them having sex, I played it at some parts and I hared my wife say “get me pregnant” stuff like that and he came inside her and they did it one more time before my wife said to him “I better get back to my husband” What I remember on that day my wife told me I fell asleep and that she tried to wake me up, but couldn’t and we ended up not having our wedding nightWhat should I do….?I haven't told my wife that I have seen this...
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breasts, cheated on me, condom, her ex, kissing, sperm, wedding, wedding night Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2008): I would say get a divorce you have that evdince to prove to the lawyers hid it from your wife so she don't burn the tape
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2008): Sorry but this sounds like it's been taken out of a very bad movie! Getting drugged on your wedding night, sperm already in the condom, your wife's ex nearby on your wedding night, etc. This is a bogus story or you wouldn't be asking this kind of question! You're telling us you never watched your wedding video till years later???????????
This is a site for real people to ask real questions and offer advice to others so please stop wasting our time.
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A
male
reader, oldfool  +, writes (18 November 2008):
 Look, it's a hoax. Can't some moderator take it down?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2008): Oh my goodness! Either this is some kind of a big joke or you are with the most sick woman on this earth. I wouldn't even call your wife a human being. She is an insult to mankind. Please come to your senses and leave her. No! You cannot be 'loving' her after you see her putting the wedding ring in a condom filled with sperms. This make me sick to my stomach. Please leave here for humanity's sake!I don't know what kind of a person you are, but no matter what, anyone, just anyone deserves much MUCH better than her! All the best!!!!!!
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A
male
reader, Tsu  +, writes (16 November 2008):
 OMFG, THIS is what is wrong with today's society...
I will admit, i got goosebumps upon readin this...I mean, HOW THE F could she do that?? Does Marriage mean NOTHING?
Personally, I think she is a slut. Seriously to go THAT far, to put the ring in the condom is basically like spitting in your face...so yea, she is a slut, and should be treated us such.
For me, putting that wedding ring in the condom, that was extreme. I would be tempted to put that tape on the internet, to bash her for the crimes she committed.
But alas, and eye for an eye makes the world blind.
So dude, leave the tramp. If she is willing to act like a slut, betray your trust, slash your vows, and the to tarnish the ring in which you pronounced undying love to her for, she deserves nothing less than to have everything taken away from her
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A
male
reader, Curles  +, writes (15 November 2008):
 Ok boss listen: as much as you've been reading a lot of comments you might get confused, i ain't saying mine is the coolest, but i'm trying to summerize all i've read:don't be a murder, the woman u married is a pornstar! please leave the place as fast as u can if only u aren't dreaming. 'i love her' it will send you to either the grave or prison, wise up!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2008): Having a little trouble with the time line of this whole thing. Sounds like you are saying that your wife drugged you on your wedding nite and had sex with someone else. How did she get the wedding tape so quickly. And what person would make such a sex tape on her wedding nite and keep it lying around the house to be discovered? Also, how did this other person have such proximity to you and your wife on your wedding nite.?
Have a DNA test done on your first kid to see if its really yours. You could have that done without anyone knowing. You may want to re-evaluate the merits of someone who you want to spend the rest of your life with. If your wife does not pass the test then your next course of action is obvious.
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A
female
reader, Fairy_Lu +, writes (14 November 2008):
 I recomend therapy for you both, you because you seem to have serious mental health issues, and her so she can deal with your extensive mental health issues.
But if this is true i would leave your wife she is obviously totally round this twist drugging you and then doing that
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2008): IF this is true
1. Do not leave the matrimonial home. Stay no matter what, in the basement if you have to.
2. Contact a family lawyer and arrange an appointment for what your legal options would be and how to act through this emotional time so as not to jeopardize your future obligations. Common Law does not care who's fault it is that the marriage is over, it's not pertinent at all. Again do not leave the matrimonial home until you talk to a lawyer.
3. Make and keep a copy of the tape.
4. Contact a social worker or psychologist and talk to your friends in the mean time.
5. Let us know how it goes.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2008): Presented with that kind of evidence surely you already have the answer. Its not love. Leave her.
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A
male
reader, oldfool +, writes (14 November 2008):
Nice story. If it's true, I don't know why you are asking this question. You sound uncannily calm about what would be anyone else's worst nightmare. If my life came crashing down around my ears like that, I wouldn't just be saying "I do not know what to do, I truly love my wife and my family".
The whole story sounds contrived, to tell you the truth. I suggest you stop wasting our time and find something better to do than post bogus stories on an advice site.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2008): I find this whole diabolical posting a bit hard to believe. It sounds like a very masochistic fantasy.
For a start, they hadn't even started out, where did this creep get the condom full of sperm from? You mean he jerked off beforehand just so he could put your wife's wedding ring in there?
The rest is just too perfidious to discuss. Drugging you and putting you in another room? On your wedding night? Him trying to get her pregnant on your wedding night (and presumably succeeding, since your daughter is 3)? And why haven't you ever looked at your wedding video before this?
No, I find it hard to swallow this story.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2008): If this is true, which is hard to believe, you need to leave! You could have a form of shock right now and even experience post traumatic stress syndrome from something like this. You are in danger.
Take this evidence to the police, don't give her a chance to destroy it. Drugging someone is a crime and you should be able to get custody of your children as this woman is dangerous......is she going to drug her children next?
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A
male
reader, EasyEK  +, writes (14 November 2008):
Brother, My heart is with you. All I can promise you is that what you have just discovered is a can of worms which might take you a life-time to analyse and understand the situation...if you are that courageous to continue living with your wife. But that just makes me continue wondering about these special complicated creatures that GOD said he created them to be our best companions in life:WOMEN. God bless you as you meddle
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2008): This is either a joke or you are dealing with a very sick and twisted girl.This sounds so nasty that I just struggle to believe something like this happened, it is so disgusting that it is hard to believe.If this is a genuine letter than dude, you have to walk and walk right now. Keep the tape, take it to the police and let them deal with her. She has humiliated you and deserves the same treatement in return. I am not one for revenge unless very called for and it is very called for here. Leave now and turn her in to the authorities, let the court watch this tape, let the local press print the details, she will be jailed hopefully and her reputation will be in tatters, no doubt.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2008): Good grief. I'm so sorry you have to go through this.If staying married no matter what is the most important thing to you, and you can live the rest of your life worrying that your wife is cheating on you. Then, yes, let sleeping dogs lie.I'd say you're going to have to talk to your wife about this. While you are confronting her, try not to be confrontational. If she feels threatened in any way she's unlikely to give you honest answers.This is going to be extremely tough for you. Your marriage may not survive this. Re-establishing trust is going to take a lot of time and both partners will need to work at it.Best of luck.
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