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age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: Let's just start with me saying that I am divorced. Been so for about 2 yrs. I've been married twice. I have 3 kids of my own. 2 girls and 1 boy. All from my first marriage. My second marriage, no kids, but my husband had 2 boys. One is in his teens and the other in his mid 20s. I keep getting facebook messages from his oldest son. I was only married for a few yrs. Now his oldest son is sending me messages on facebook. He said we should get together and have dinner or something. How weird is this? Does this mean he wants something else? What should I say or do? Should I tell his dad? Or leave it alon?
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female
reader, OhGetReal  +, writes (16 February 2011):
 Well they wouldn't post what I originally said but let's try this. It is interesting mostly men have answered and given you a big thumbs up. I'm giving you a big thumbs down. Regardless of your divorce from your step son's father he will always be your step son if you don't blow it. What you are thinking about is immoral on so many levels for one he's half your age you've had his father I mean gross. Have some class. Why does it have to be him if you want to have sex with a 20 year old pick one up on a bar and don't tell your family.
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male
reader, nononsense +, writes (15 February 2011):
Trust me. He wants to get some. Its no big deal, you arent married anymore and as long as you understand it isn't forever, keep it to yourself. You are both adults.
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (15 February 2011):
 Ah so you have a thing for your stepson, I was going to ask but I wasn't sure. There's absolutely nothing illegal about it in America. However, are you on good terms with this boy's father? If you started seeing him it will definitely make things go south between you two. If you aren't even on speaking terms with your ex husband then by all means go to dinner with your former stepson. However, standby on your feelings and see what his intentions are first.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks to the both of you. I wrote him and told him we could go out sometime. So we will see. As far as where it would go, I don't know where I stand on it. Do I want him? Would I be willng? Maybe! Depends on the night and how it goes
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2011): The big question is whether you want something else other than dinner and a glass or three of wine.
Like tennisstar88 says, he may be just looking for a mother figure and wants to stay in touch for no other reason than he simply likes you in a platonic way.
Maybe he's after jumping your bones, and if he is, you need to work out where you would stand if that was the case. There's nothing illegal in it as far as I know.
Should you tell his dad? Difficult one. Why not find out what the boy's intentions are first. Accept his invitation. We're not mind-readers and neither are you, so basically the ball is in your court as to what you do next.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell he has asked me to meet him out. Hang out, and he has said a few flirty jokes in there but he always says he is just kidding.
I didn't have much of a relationship with him. He wasn't around much. But he was always nice to me. What if I go to dinner with him and he does pull a move?
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (14 February 2011):
What was your relationship with your stepson like? Did your ex-husand get remarried? What do these messages say?
It sounds like he's just trying to be friendly given the circumstances. You were his stepmother. Take it at face value as a boy who may not have any motherly influence in his life at the moment and is probably missing it.
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