A
female
age
36-40,
*arakiss
writes:I put that in the title to get people's attention, cause I really need advice on this. I'm tired of the comments my sister-in-law makes about me to my brother, and I'm mad at him for letting her feel like she doesn't have to respect me. Our whole family knows that she gave him herpes, but we still continue to be nice to her.My brother and his wife met online. She lived in Panama and has been trying to get him to go over there to live with her. A few years after they got married, he found out he had Herpes. He still doesn't know if she gave it to him on purpose or not...My brother told me about a month ago that besides me, he doesn't think she likes anyone in the family. I'm getting tired of this drama $#!^. I can't talk to my mom about it cause she says she's not gonna stop being nice to her for fear that she'll lose her son. And I don't know if my other brother and his wife will believe this conversation I had between my brother and I a month ago, because my witch of a sister-in-law is really smart and has been really nice to them lately . To top off the fact that she's good at being fake, I am the youngest in the family... My brothers are and their wives are in their late 30s and I'm only 25. Plz help !
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female
reader, Fabulosa +, writes (8 January 2011):
 Good idea. Remeber that there's two sides to ever story.
A
female
reader, parakiss +, writes (7 January 2011):
parakiss is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYeah, I don't get into their relationship. He complains to me about her and I just sit there saying " Yeah. Uh-huh. Oh really?" I guess I should just tell him how I feel about how I think he needs to tell her to stfu about me or else.
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A
female
reader, Adorskable  +, writes (7 January 2011):
 I feel that the best thing for you to do is stay away from there relationship. Let your brother handle this situation, if he chooses to be with her or not in reality is his decision.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2011): Sites like Hsoulmate,com have allowed people living with an STD to be able to safely and comfortably reach out to meet others living with the same issues. The "issues" one faces having STD's are not entirely physical....By joining with others you can overcome the mental anguish, loneliness and at times anger associated from having to "live with".
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A
female
reader, Fabulosa +, writes (7 January 2011):
Maybe its not as bad as it sounds. Maybe it is. Either way if he's excepting it there's not much u can do.
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A
female
reader, parakiss +, writes (6 January 2011):
parakiss is verified as being by the original poster of the questionPetinal, why would he be defending a bad life ? They were married and then a few years later he found out he had Herpes. To this day he thinks she might have cheated on him...
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A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (6 January 2011):
 Plus, we dont know what goes on behind closed doors. If she's given him herpes then she could be still cheating on him and not giving him a good life, he could be defending all this.
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A
female
reader, parakiss +, writes (6 January 2011):
parakiss is verified as being by the original poster of the questionFabulosa, I am mad at him for not putting his foot down. He says hes defends me, but she should respect me so much that she just keeps her thoughts about me to herself.
Adorskable, no it doesn't show how much he loves her. He told me he's not 100% happy with her and that he dosen't trust her and that he's afraid that he'll never find anyone else because of the Herpes thing, but like you said it's his choice, I've never told him to leave her and I never will. I just want that ho to stop taking $#!+
Petinal, for awhile now I've tried killing her to death with kindess. I even thought she got past her issue with me (my mom thinks she's jealous of me too), but then about a month ago my brother told me sum stuff she said about me. Really, I'm not jealous, I know to strangers it might sound that way, but I really want my brother to be happy... He says that sometimes he feels like crying and that he gets depressed because of the Herpes thing.
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A
female
reader, Fabulosa +, writes (5 January 2011):
He's the one who choose to be married to her. He'd your big brother and should stick up for you. So if he's not doing his brotherly dutys you should be mad at him. And don't get cought up in that drama
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A
female
reader, Adorskable +, writes (4 January 2011):
Keep your distance this is your brother life and he chose her to be in it. If he didn't leave her when she gave him herpes than that shows how much he loves her and this will be a losing battle for you. Love your brother and respect his decision.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2011): She soundlike a person with a personality disoerder. They wants to create chaos out of order. They like to turn people agianst one another It may be the a relative or somebody else. The usual scenario is this person causing all kinds of problems and preventing those around them from having a normal functional life. The disorded person knows people want to live without friction and they use this knowledge as leverage to up-end the lives of those around them. It usually doesn’t matter if we people that don't like drama are successful in keeping things in balance or not. All the the disordered person cares about is stirring the pot and getting people pitted against each other and keeping things in a chaotic state. The nut sits back and lets the play unfold to his amusement. Give them enough rope and they all ways hang themselves.
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A
female
reader, petina1 +, writes (4 January 2011):
Sounds like theres a bit of jealousy going on one way or the other here. Were you and your brother close. You could try reverse psychology on her and be really really nice to her no matter what, especially in front of your brother. If not you will just have to give her a wide berth. Or you could have a meeting with her to clear the air, just the two of you.
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