A
male
age
30-35,
*iffy
writes:Okay this ones a complicated one. Basically a year and a half ago I started teaching my best friend's girlfriend the drums. We both had feelings for each other (you know when you can just tell they like you and vis versa)and eventually we ended up seeing each other for reasons other then drums, if you know what mean. Whilst all of this was going on c.c (the girl) was still with my best friend. After 2 weeks of hiding and covering up our feeling from everyone including her boy friend she dumped him which put me in a bad place because as a best friend I was meant to conform and help my friend get over c.c but of course I was falling in love with her and still seeing her in secret. We carried on seeing each other in secret for 3 months because we were to scared to face our friends and the hassle that would come with it. Having to lie to everyone all the time made me extreamly unhappy and at some points and at a party I ended up having sex with my ex girlfriend which seemed fine to every body else because they didn't know I was with c.c. I told c.c and she eventually forgave me and things were going really well and by this point we were madly in love. Things went amazingly well after that. we were completely happy for months but then we went on a break from each other for a bit and i was devastated and lonely. I got all irrational and lonely and slept with a girl on our break and hated myself for it. I decided not to talk to anyone about it and pretend i didn't happen because that mistake made me realize all i wanted was c.c. So me and c.c went back out because we missed each other and did in fact love each other. I kept my secret about having sex with someone on our break for months but I told her last weekend. It went badly and now we are split up but we still love each other. I don't know what to do. I love her. help?!?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, shna  +, writes (9 February 2009):
 if you really really loved her you never would have cheated ever
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