A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My friend and I have slept together a few times. I talk to this boy everyday. We get along great, trust each other and have not once argued. We tell each other stuff we would not tell anyone else.He just recently started seeing this girl. Well he wanted a roommate and I needed a place to stay so he wanted me to move in with him. Well I did. He still wants to have sex with me even though he is dating her. Im quite confused as to why he is doing this?Me and my ex used to hang out with him and his ex. That kinda makes it a whole different story. He is friends with my ex, while I am friends with his.Is he just using me?Does he like me, but know it would hurt our exes?please help someone...
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female
reader, bubbloo24  +, writes (22 July 2008):
 You know this says wrong all over it so if it feels wrong, it will 99% certain that it is wrong.
He wants to have his cake and eat it, what Askoldersister has said is all true. If he wanted you, he would try to be with you, but he wants both of you.
Please please, don't make yourself his bit on the side. It is the worst place to be besides the being the actual partner when they don't know the affair is taking place.
He will say lovely things to you, he will be kind to you and try to sweet talk you into getting into his way of thinking but you have to step up the mark and say to yourself that you will not become his bit on the side and that you're worth more than that.
You can still be mates with this guy, nothing's stopping you from doing that, but I would persuade you to avoid being alone with him because you will be tempted. I would also persuade you to tell him to stop his advances because it's not right and it's a situation you don't want to step into.
You will find someone who will want you and you alone, so don't settle for second best and do not BECOME second best because you deserve to be the only girl that a guy wants to hold, cherish and love.
Take care xx
A
female
reader, scrazy  +, writes (22 July 2008):
 Yes, he is just using you and I'm asking you, not to fall for any line he may throw with you.
Unless he plans on breaking up with his girlfriend for you, this man has no intention of benefiting anyone but himself.
Why have one girl when he can have two? And the second is just a room away from his?
If you want a real, committed relationship, sleeping with him is NOT the way to go.
Tell him you're not interested in being his girl on the side.
XO
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (22 July 2008):
 You're confused as to why a guy might like some extra sex? Without any relationship burdens? And available on tap as the girl on the side is his roommate?
Look, he might indeed be a fabulous friend, but he's a cheater to his girlfriend. What does that tell you about his character?
I think it may be time to look for somewhere else to live. Your friend's number one priority is Mr. Willy. You and his girlfriend are competing for second place. Unless you don't mind coming in third, of course.
This is going to end in tears. Think it all the way through. "Hi, Bessie, nice to see you here! [I wish I could tell you that I've just slept with the guy you're dating but think the world of, but he's such a good guy and we've never argued.] Please come in! [And let me take a look at the sofa to make sure there are no signs that he and I had sex on it just a few hours ago.] Let me get you a beverage, or a cup of coffee. [God, he asked me to do the shopping, and I didn't....] [Wait, what am I, his handmaiden? His sex on the side?]
Think it all the way through. Take good care of yourself. Oh, and please use condoms.
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A
female
reader, Typical'Ox  +, writes (22 July 2008):
 To be truthful this guy sounds like a bit of a pig, remember your body is precious, and you shouldnt give it away to just any-one. You need to sit down and talk to him and lay down the law.
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