A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: So last night me and my boyfriend John(I'm gay) were hanging out in the lounge room at my house. We were having a great time watching one our favorite shows:Glee. Throughout the whole show he would touch me, rub my belly and do all these cutesy kind of things. And since I was home alone, I didn't have to worry about my parents overseeing us interact in that way.(they don't know that I'm gay or that I'm in a relationship with John)So we were there having a great time laughing and horsing around... for some reason we ended up wrestling each other. You know how guys are... and then he was on top of me, smiling down at me. It was a tender moment, it kinda felt unreal; felt like a scene from a movie or something. He just sat there on top of me staring into my eyes, both of us quiet. Then he started kissing me...and wispered very seductively into my ear that he wanted to fxck me. I'd never seen this side of him before...but i liked it, it turned me on. So I agreed, I was widely aroused at that point and we ended up having sex. Like I said my parents weren't home, they wouldn't for another 4 hours or so. Boy was I wrong...I guess i wasn't paying attention to outside noises. Because I had to look at my mom's frantic face at the door while my boyfriend was inside me. Now my mind is going ballistic with a bunch of emotions. the sex was great, it somewhat connected us more on a whole new level..we've been together for 5 months. But now I'm afraid of what my parents are thinking..I'm embarrassed and ashamed at the same time. I'm worried that they're gonna put some kind of boundary against me and John. I'd be devastated. After she walked in on us she just sharply shut the door and we scrambled..I got him out of the house. I heard her and my dad talking about it in the living room so I snuck up to my room. I skipped dinner so I wouldnt have to face them, we still haven't talked about till today. What should I do? I feel so awkward in the house now. I don't to be apart from John and I want my parents to accept me, but from past things I've heard them say...they're probly really homophobic. I've been avoiding them as much as i can. I need help!
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2013): its hard but all men and women will have a desire for sexual intercouse... hey well you werent delivered by a stork.... DO NOT BE ASHAMED for being GAY.... you are unique and different and thats okay... Remember your parents love you, no matter what.... i am a girl and straight and i have no problem with anyone being gay, and i don't even know you.... therefore nor should your parents
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2010): Alright well I'm 13, female, and absolutly straight. I have many gay and bisexual friends. I know one of them who practically had the same thing happen to them. I am very mature for my age so please do not be surprised that a girl my age is writing this. Well my friends name is Austin, he is now 18 (yes I hang out with older ppl but I also hang out with kids my age, I hang out with 17 and 18 year olds which most of them are gay) now this happened to Austin a few months ago when he was still 17. He has a boyfriend, Demetri and they were at his house alone watching a movie, they got carried away and Austins parents caught them. He was extremely embarrassed because he had been telling them that he had a girlfriend, one of our closest friends Shasta even pretended to be his girlfriend because she is lesbian and they were being eachothers covers. Austin didn't talk to his parents at all for a few days, his parents know me because I am the youngest of his friends, so Austin asked Me, Demetri, Shasta, Rave, Skylar, Johnny, Anthony, and Kristi to come to his house and help him talk to his parents. I was the first to show up and Austin was stressing and crying, once everyone arrived we faced his parents, he apologized for getting carried away and he said that he shouldve waited till he was 18, his parents were upset but they knew that they couldn't change him, and I think that they understood that he had strong feelings toward Demetri. They understood that he was still THEIR son and they got used to the idea of having a gay son. In the end it will all work out, I'm sure that if your parents didn't start screaming when they caught you, then they probably are pondering in their head how to confront you. Everything will turn out alright, I hope I helped, and I hope that you get things cleared up:) best wishes and best of luck!
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female
reader, SceneXaddicted +, writes (1 October 2010):
 Never be embarrassed or ashamed. I told my family in a public restaurant I liked boys and GIRLS. Always be proud of who you are, those who cant accept it are too closed minded for emotions. Remember, its PEOPLE fall in Love not Genitals. Talking is the best option. They know, either way. So no matter if you confront the subject or not, they know the truth now. Live the truth, be honest with yourself.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys for all the help. It really let me be able to think about the situation in different perspectives. We still haven't talked about it, I get home say hi and go to my room. Avoiding everything. But I liked what the what the last paragraph of what heartfullalove said. It's exactly how I feel. So I think I'm gonna write a letter stating those things and more and leave it in their room. And see what happens.
And to clarify my age I'm 16, turning 17 in a month. But thank you for the help.
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A
female
reader, Baybiegirl +, writes (28 September 2010):
 Hunny there is no limit to that you passion for someone. I think you should let them think it out. My parents are the same way. They caught me with my girlfriend about a year back and they hate that i'm bi and try not to bring it up alot. They aren't happy about it but I don't care really. Love is love and passion is passion, no one should put a boundry on that!
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female
reader, xotruelove14ox +, writes (28 September 2010):
Heartfullalove; I was aware of the age group he is in that why I said that (I figured he was a bit older...) so yeah just ignore that part.. lol
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2010): 13-15???? Aren't you a little young for full penetrative sex?
I dearly hope you played safe and he used a condom.
Anyway - you are where you are, and you won't want a lecture. Have you spoken to or even seen your parents since? Presumably you're so embarrassed and mortified that it'll be another ten or twenty years before you feel able to look your parents in the eye. They will likely be embarrassed and mortified too. As they would have been even if it had been a girl you were having fun with. And they might have a lot of difficulty looking you in the eye too. Moving out isn't an option for you, although you could just tip-toe around and dodge the issue.
One avenue is that all of you could completely ignore the elephant in the room, and say nothing, never speak of it. It would however be way more constructive to actually face the music. Here, a whole lot depends on how homophobic your parents are. If they're Biblically hard-line against such modern perversions, you'll have to live with it while you're living under their roof. If they're completely fine with it, you're lucky. Most likely, they're somewhere in between, like most people in 2010 (i.e. they would pay lip-service to the idea of gay equality but privately feel a bit creeped out or disgusted at the idea that gays would get up to anything sexual). If they are slightly homophobic but not completely hatefully venomous about it (like my parents were) there's every chance that having a gay son will change their minds over time, I'd bet a few gallons of oil on it. If they hate you and disown you, than they're not worthy parents. I hope it doesn't come to that.
At any rate, at least you won't have to agonise for years about 'how do I come out?' - you've already done so in about the most dramatic way possible. (Depending on your mannerisms and the way you carry yourself, maybe they already had a fair idea?) In the event that you have a conversation about this, I think your best bet is something like
'Mom, Dad, I'm really really sorry that you had to see what happened. I got carried away and I felt like I couldn't help it and I didn't think you'd be home so early or I never would have gone so far. I know this is hard for you to face, but I'm really in love with my boyfriend and I've tried so hard not to be gay and there's really nothing I can do about it. I feel really worried that you'll hate me and I need your support. I'm still your son and I hope you want me to be happy.'
I wish you every success with this, you've got my best wishes. Take a deep breath and be brave.
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male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (28 September 2010):
 The only advice I have for you is too face them and let them know who you are as a person and that you would apprieciate them accepting that. Things could be worse, they could have been screaming right at that moment or when my gf's sister was caught having sex with her ex bf by his mom the mom just stood there watching and crying.
It seems to be a good sign that you haven't experienced any over reactions from them.
Now you can either go up to them and explain that you are gay or just go on your every day life and wait for them to bring it up. Personally I reccomend the harder one involving you starting the conversation because it shows how serious you are.
Best of luck to you.
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A
female
reader, xotruelove14ox +, writes (28 September 2010):
Aweeee, I hope to death that your parents aren't homophobes and accept you as you! Over all they will still love you; I mean you are there son after all I can't imagine them stop loving you because your gay! Just sit them down (it will of course be terribly awkward but your going to have to talk about it sometime) and tell them "Mom I know what you saw certainly shocked you, and you might be embarresed or ashamed to have a son who is gay, but you shouldn't be, people aren't going to turn on you because I am gay, and dad this doesn't mean we shouldn't do father son activites that other fathers do" (etc. Just tell them the truth and ik the father/son part is kind of corny but you can think of what to say) Don't feel awkward in your own house, if your parents don't accept you, then move out, either now, or finish school or whatever, chances are - although things will be really awkward for awhile (I mean your mom saw you fxcking another guy what do you expect) - your parents will (over time) learn to accept the fact that their son is gay.. Everything is going to be okay! Be proud of who you are, everyone loves you! (I love gays personally I think they are wicked awesome lmao, so don't feel ashamed because your gay!)
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