A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:i am so confused, i met a guy on a bbw internet dating site a few months ago. we have spoken threw the site and msn for a month or so now.we have exchanged phoned numbers and he has called me and now wishes us to meet, however....he doesnt seem to be giving me much attention at the moment. i have explained to him that i have had a few relationships turn soar, i have a few trusting issues and i need some attention but he doesnt seem to be giving me that, when i point this out to him he calls but then nothing again for days. When we talk he always makes a point of saying that he know i find me attractive and im drawn to him, but he never seems to give anything back other than if i didnt like you i wouldnt ring you for over an hour. I am so confused i dont know if this guy is a player? an ego booster? or for real? My views are if he wanted to take this further, he would make more of an effort even a sms each day even if its just to say hi. Am i being unreasonable? I am so confused, half of me wants so much to go and meet him, but the other half is scared of being hurt. i really dont want to make a fool of myself all over againthank you for taking the time to read this
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female
reader, leanne.od +, writes (22 September 2007):
 its hard to trust someone you haven't met and it appears your putting more in than he is. a compliment costs nothing but means everything.
i think that youneed to talk to him, seriously and tell him your fed up with the way he acts and he either shapes up or ships out. at the end of the day, if he's loosing interest he's probably too gutless to tell you so ask the question outright and he'll have no choice than to answer.
good luck
A
female
reader, superbunny +, writes (21 September 2007):
 Hi honey,I think it's hard to judge someone too much until you've met them. You'll probably be able to suss out if he's an ego booster/player/for real once you've met him - probably within the first five minutes.I think one thing we all tend to do is expect a new relationship to fix things or personality traits that are a result of the last. You say need attention and have trust issues, well perhaps telling him this when you've only been talking for a month is a bit too much too soon, although I'm sure you can fix anything in time. :]You're not going to know if you're gonna be hurt until you "dip your toes in the water". Life is all about being knocked over, standing back up again, brushing yourself down and get on with it - don't let past experiences hurt the future.I hope this helps. :] x
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