A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I recently purchased a $400-valued Coach handbag and I carry it everywhere with me. My family and I are visiting relatives in east Asia this winter, and my mom is concerned that my handbag will attract unwanted attention and thieves. While I understand her concerns, I completely disagree with her. Firstly, the capital cities we are visiting are significantly more safe than where I live, in southern California. Secondly, my handbag is not a designer handbag which cost a couple thousand dollars. I think it's because she never grew up spending on luxuries, and neither have I. This is one of the rare splurges I have made on myself, with the money I earned. I'm a college student and I work part time, so I understand she didn't completely agree with me purchasing the handbag in the first place. We visit our relatives in Asia annually and I speak the languages fluently. I simply like my handbag and want to carry it, which is why I bought it. How can I soothe my mom's concerns if she brings it up again? Thank you!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2013): Thanks everyone! Your responses helped see what my mom was trying to say. I guess the only difference carrying the handbag there VS here, is that there it may be harder to report. To respond, I think my mom was more concerned with me buying the handbag than actually bringing it abroad. I purchased it for $300. While I'm not saying $300 isn't money, I won't be too thrown off if I lost it. So to answer a question, I don't want to lose it (obviously) but I can afford to replace it. I think it's more than reasonable for me to bring the handbag, but I also acknowledge and accept the risks. Also I'm bringing it for function not style. I don't have anything other bag to bring other than my school bag and another smaller purse.If I were going to say Europe, then I would probably find a cheaper bag to bring. As I blend in with the people there and designer bags (like Louis Vuitton) are very popular, I think I will be fine. Many thanks!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2013): It just depends on what you feel comfortable in replacing.
I'd travel with my coach bag - $600 doesn't bother me. However, my LV, Prada & Burberry bags - to SE Asia or South America or Eastern Europe. HECK NO. I've traveled witht he LV and Burberry to NY & Canada. Coach has traveled to Europe no problem. Prada, I'm scared to take anywhere.
It just depends. I think coach isn't a brand that is known worldwide or at the same caliber as other bags. It just depends if you feel comfy replacing it JUST INCASE it does get stolen or damaged or lost while traveling.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (30 September 2013):
 You won't be able to soothe your mom's concerns. Presumably you've given her your arguments as you presented them here. So she is aware of your take on it. She has her own take on it.
Is she hysterical about things a lot? Is she controlling? Is she out of touch with reality?
Is she realistic about things? Does she let most things roll off her back? Is she practical?
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (30 September 2013):
 and yes if it gets lost or stolen or damaged mom has the right to FOREVER Say "I TOLD YOU SO"
I love my good everyday leather bag. But even for my best vacations I carry a cheap cross body bag with lots of pockets and room.
NEVER take something on vacation with you that you
a. don't want to lose
b. can't afford to replace
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (30 September 2013):
 Not being female, I'll never understand why anyone would spend that much on a purse to begin with. Being that as it may..The real question is "Who's money paid for that thing?" If she paid for it out of her money then obey her wishes...If you worked hard for the money and are willing to lose it then don't obey her and go ahead and gamble that thieves are going to pass up an easy mark and let you keep your prize bag.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (30 September 2013):
 As a matter of fact, your mom's concern is not as paranoid as you make it. The purse is yours so if it gets stolen, your loss, true- but I am sure she does not want your attire may draw unwanted attention on all of you as a group or as a family when you go around. She does not want ALL of you to be mugged because somebody saw your bag and draws the wrong conclusions. There are places in the world where they aren't that fashion savvy, and they would not say "oh it's just a Coach, not a Luis Vuitton, or a Hermes ", - anything that suggests " tourist " or " North American " makes you a possible, easy target. And there are places where the maybe 10 bucks they would get for your Coach bag at the local " thief market ", feed a family for a week, or a month- so it 's even worth hurting you . If it gets stolen, it does not get stolen by Arsene Lupin the gentleman thief in yellow gloves , - it would probably be two guys on a motocycle, they 'll accost you, grab and pull... sending you flying in the midlle of the crazy traffic of a big Asian city.
My ex got robbed at knife point for his SHOES ( yes, like Carrie in Sex and the City :) in Brazil. He speaks Portuguese well, and he is a very seasoned traveller who knows better than going around flashing a Rolex on his wrist. So he was dressed very low key, T shirt and old jeans I think, only he had forgotten to change from " good " shoes into plastic flip flops. It was enough to draw attention on him , and get him followed and accosted few blocks from his hotel in a NICE part of the city. Later he could smile about how he had to walk home barefoot,- LATER,
Plus, if this is your only nice bag, why do you want to risk that it goes misplaced or forgotten somewhere as it some times it happens in the rush and distraction of travelling ?...
Maybe, just for once, I'd listen to mom .
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (30 September 2013):
 I agree with the other Aunties.
If you are dead-set on bringing it - then tell your mom, that you are old enough and responsible enough to handle carrying an expensive purse.
Just remember if it does get stolen you mom has the PRIVILEGE to say, I told you so!
Furthermore I agree with iAmHereToHelpYou when she mention that is ISN'T a smart thing to bring expensive things with you on holiday because it makes getting it back or report it (if it gets stolen) really hard.
Besides, it's a purse.. It's not like you can't go on holiday without it and not survive.
You mom is just being practical.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (30 September 2013):
"mom I appreciate your concern but I'm an adult now and it's my loss should the bag get stolen and I'm willing to take that risk, can we please just not discuss this further?"
and then it's up to you to either stick to your guns or not.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (30 September 2013):
 Tell her its your loss if it gets stolen. So that is your worry, not hers. You just need to show her you are an adult who takes responsibility for your actions. Meaning if it does get stolen (or whatever else she worries about) you will not cry to her about it, but suck it up like an adult.
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