A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes: He says he does not know why but he cannot feel a connection to me. he says he cannot feel anything in his heart anymore since his live in gf of 5 yrs cheated on him. It has been 4 yrs since she did this. we started seeing each other 1 yr ago. He considers me fwb. I want more. he says there will never be anything between us. calls me 1 time per week. Does not see me but every 2 to 3 weeks. Treats me well when we see each other and spends the whole day with me. Says he enjoys coming over and fixing things for me. He fixes things like the faucet. I am still confused as to connection. We have fun together. What is connection? or is he just so afraid of being hurt that as he told me once that he did not know why he could feel in his heart anymore. Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (30 September 2013):
I read your other posts about this matter, you had multiple answers and you are still confused?
You are looking for an answer that tells you how to make someone fall in love with you when this guy has clearly said that he can't...why won't you believe what he says? Why won't you take notice of all the answers the 'Aunts' here have given you?
The definition of madness is trying the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome...you must be suffering from some strange madness if you think you can make him love you...you are wasting your time.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (30 September 2013):
And this one: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/why-does-he-say-he-feels-no-connection.html
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (30 September 2013):
This one: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/is-it-possible-for-a-fwb-to-turn.html
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (30 September 2013):
the connection is that you are casual friends who have sex.
he has told you there will be nothing more, you want more and that's NOT GOING TO HAPPEN no matter what you want.
he's made it clear that you that he's not interested in anything but FWB.
Do not hope this will change. You are setting yourself up for great pain if you continue to see him and hope that this will work out.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2013): Do you know what FWB means? He is clearly telling you that the only relationship you will have with him is just that. Nothing more. It sounds like you want or think it's something more, but it isn't.If you are looking to be in a relationship with someone, then you need to be involved with someone who will give you all of them, not just some of them. At least he is being honest about it. Be honest with yourself as well and decide if this is really what you want.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2013): What's to be confused about? He said he doesn't have a connection to you, in other words he doesn't have romantic feelings for you.
OP trust him when he says there's no possibility of a relationship, he means it, it's been a year he'd know by now if things were going to be any different. He'd have feelings for you already but he has none. Just because you hope he's lying or that his mind will change doesn't mean it will.
What does he mean? He means he'll never give you the more that you want, he knows after a year of this that it'll never be anything more and that's something you'll just have to accept.
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A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy +, writes (30 September 2013):
He means he doesn't love you, I'm afraid. You want something he can't give. Better to break it off with him and start afresh with someone capable of a loving relationship. He's told you he's not that man, and you can't fix or change him. You can't make him love you. It would have happened by now since this has been going on for a year already. Don't waste any more of your precious time on him. All the best.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2013): He is telling you that he does not want your relationship to be anything more than it is. You want more, he is saying he doesn't feel that way himself. If you carry on in this situation you will only end up getting hurt because he will never change his mind. He will never find this 'connection' because he is happy for this to remain a fwb situation. There is nothing you can do to change this I'm afraid.
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