A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Dear cupidi am separated from my husband ( he is ^^^^ and i hate him). I am seeing one of my office colleague, we were friends and then got attached. Me getting separated from my husband have nothing to do with my bf. my husband is impotent, we waited till marriage to have sex (my husband's idea obviously).In office, they started talking about my affair with my bf and they were passing nasty comments and some even asked my bf whether we are sleeping together. instead of defending me or saying that's none of their business, he said we are just friends.Why can't he say to them we are seeing each other or dating, whats wrong with it. Office policy does allow dating colleague. Does he not want to pursue this relationship, when i asked he said he don't want to add anymore gossip, why will there be a gossip when we come out and say we are dating. Please help me. I don't want this one also to screw up, btw my bf is younger to my by 3 years
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (11 June 2012):
 I think he said it TO defend you. And to get people to MIND their own business.
YOU are still married and that is what people JUDGE.
ALSO if it is against OFFICE POLICY to date he might want to make SURE you both still have a job.
Cut him some slack, honey.
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (11 June 2012):
 I note this, in your submittal: ".... Office policy does allow dating colleague..."
Have you and your paramour friend decided which of you will leave your employment when H/R sez to you: " Office policy does allow dating colleague.... so ONE OF YOU must go....."
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, BondGirl72 +, writes (11 June 2012):
 When two people are dating in the same office there can be a lot of gossip that can make for a toxic work environment. Trust me, I know. Don't carry on your relationship (or talk of it) in the workplace. I think your bf is correct that he should maintain the appearance of "just friends" at work because it is work and that is what you are there to do. You are not there to discuss your relationship or make announcements about your relationship. When you are outside of work, you can do as you please. I would not feel comfortable making announcements about my relationship because it is private. Just because two people work at the same place does not mean anything.
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A
male
reader, Ayan Ganguly  +, writes (10 June 2012):
 Every people deal with a certain situation in their own way..Your bf is right in his own way by not allowing the rumour mill to go on and at the same time you are right in doubting. I'll suggest don't worry ovr silly issues and break your head..rather talk out any confusion that may arise between you two..don't let a 3rd person to play an active or a passive role in your relationship...if their is a problem or you don't like something talk it ou..hope it helps
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2012): It is considered a scandal if a MARRIED woman is having an affair with an unmarried coworker. People will gossip. Until your divorce from your husband is finalized, you and your coworker should maintain the appearance of being friends while you are at work.
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