A
female
age
36-40,
*ishingonastar
writes:Please help my marriage is on the rocks because of this. My husband has a friend who we both agreed is a bad one to be associated with. (Drugs, no respect, cont. In trouble etc) so the friend won't stop calling texting etc. We have had problems whenever this friend comes around because I can't trust him and therefor when my husband is with him I worry because I don't want my husband to do something stupid and get in trouble. Well on the most recent problem is I have asked that his friend not contact my husband anymore. The friend then calls me a b*tch and tells my husband that I ruined is life and I'm a miserable person and his life is going to be miserable with me. My husband didn't defend me or tell his friend not to disrespect me etc. And I feel as his wife he should have stuck up for me. Now I'm hurt and confused because I feel that my husband has chosen not to stand up for me and let his friend disrespect me. It may sound crazy but now I am depressed and wonder if he would protect me. I feel hurt and my husband doesn't understand. He thinks I should just let it go and he is mad at me for being upset by this. Its been over a week and I can't let it go. I can't get over my husband letting his friend disrespect me. Now I'm lost and confused and I don't know how to get over this. I know that the friend will continue to cause problems and wonder if my husband will ever stand up for me and our marriage. Please help what should I do? How can I gain respect for my husband again? How can I feel protected by my husband again? Marriage is in crisis please help!
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female
reader, NurseBetty85 +, writes (10 January 2009):
 I would like to start out by saying I'm sorry for what you're going threw. Your husband needs to be on your side and stick up for you no matter what. If his friend is such a trouble maker, your husband might even fear him. You need to sit down with him and let him know this is tearing you apart inside. A wife needs to feel like shes #1 in her Husbands life, not #2. He has no respect for you if he lets his friend treat you like this.I hope you can work this out, just be stong. In the mean time stand up for yourself whenever his friend is acting like a jerk.
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