A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: i have been with my bf for over a year and i feel as though we have drifted apart i never see him (with the hours he works and what i work, even though we live together). and when we talk it is only really because i come home from work and he has had a few drinks. i get annoyed with him a lot and i knew that he always loved me more than i did him at the start(i did love him and get the whole butterfly feelings when i would see him) but not so sure any more if i should stay with him??? i think i love him but def not how i was. is this just a phase will it go away??? and will i love him again??? or should i end it??? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, IHateWomanBeaters +, writes (8 April 2011):
I don't buy into the idea that your relationship is meant for marriage, especially since you have met, done all the adult stuff, loved, and lost love in just over a year.I would call it quits, honestly.Relationships are not supposed to be forcibly held together.
A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (8 April 2011):
One question mark is all that's necessary at the end of a sentence.
On to your questions. Is this just a phase? Sort of. As relationships progress they evolve. Feelings change but that doesn't mean that you no longer love the person, it means that your love has evolved. That initial infatuation wears off with time, and that's when you settle in to what will be more the norm for the rest of the relationship.
Will you love him again? I think you still do, it's just different. Think of this, is there anything he could do that might help bring that spark back? Would it be worth it to you to talk to him about it and try to salvage the relationship?
Should you stay with him? That depends on you and him. How much effort are you both willing to make? Long term relationships don't just happen, they take work and continued effort from both people involved. They have their ups and downs, but if you're meant to be, you'll both want to make it work no matter what problems you face. You need to figure out how much effort you want to put in here.
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