A
male
age
30-35,
*onelyMan
writes:Well here goes i believe my life sucks. Im 15 never ever dated or even had my first kiss,Ive asked out more then 50 girls and they all denied me,Im also very short im 5-1 so that makes life tougher,My parents disowned me,And i have no friends because no one can understand me,I have no goal in life but to to make everyone in the world feel my pain and die i want the world to literally end. And im considered a social outcast and sometimes a nerd, I also believe ive fallen under depression. Please give me advice.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2009): Either way, whether ot not they have actually disowned you, it sounds to me like the things you are focusing on are purely shallow and superficial and should not be so important.
You focus on height and girls. Well honey when I was fifteen, i had never dated or kissed anyone or been asked out.
There was a guy who went around asking every girl out and they all said "no" because.. well duh, he asks everyone out! He's just desperate, not actually interested. It was almost insulting!
And being short (although you still have years before you are finished growing) doesn't mean anything! I have never in my life ignored someone, or hated them because they were too tall, or too short. It sounds to me like you have an overally bad attitude but are blaming it on silly things, when in reality, you don't treat people the right way.
You are surprised to have no friends, yet you say your goal in life is for people to feel your pain. I wouldn't want to be the friend of someone who wanted me to feel pain.
If you could stop wallowing in self pity and learn to help people around you and selflessly focus on someone's happiness but your own, you would be seen by other people as more than just
the depressed kid who walks around asking girls out all day and doesn't seem to want anyone to be happy.
It's YOUR fault that you don't have a real goal in life, and that's where you need to start. By making a goal. And then you need to stop thinking of yourself and concentrate on other people. Then you need to figure out what's going on with your parents. And get a job. Working a being productive instills a sense of self worth in people. I was a front end supervisor at a grocery store, and was in charge of tons of students i knew from my school. I saw kids at school who only had a couple friends and seemed unhappy, but when they got to work, they were amoung the happiest to be there and the hardest workers.
But of course, if you've been disowned.. i'm sure you have a job. Right?
These people have all been gently and understanding, so i'm here offering a different point of view. My answers are typically nothing like this, but this sort of makes me angry.
If you want to be better, than than help yourself. Get your head straight and be grateful.
Be grateful for your health, your wealth, the fact that you live in america and aren't straining for food every day of your life and hiding from abuse, you're not diseased and dyeing, imprisoned, inslaved, addicted to drugs, handicapped, and lord knows what other misfortunes.
There's so much to be thankful for so i suggest making that list and studying it.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2009): Your parents can not have legally disowned you at your age. What's really going on there?
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A
male
reader, karldlewis  +, writes (1 January 2009):
What may help is if you don't ask loads of people because everyone will just think you're desperate. Remember to be yourself and if people can't get over your size than they are the ones with the problems.
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A
male
reader, LonelyMan +, writes (1 January 2009):
LonelyMan is verified as being by the original poster of the questionsee thts the thing all the short girls want the tall guys i have no luck in anything girls always clown me for my height and they reject me all the time im humble very well educated ad i treat them right but i always come off as a friend or something idk how to cope
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A
male
reader, LonelyMan +, writes (1 January 2009):
LonelyMan is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni did meet this one girl and were really good friends i fell in love with her but when i finnally told her she denied me and told me she only sees me as a brother. No girl likes me idk why
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A
female
reader, searbear +, writes (1 January 2009):
 Ok, your pain aside. Why don't you go out and buy some clothes and get a haircut the way you want it? Do something you really want to do, which will have a good effect on you.
I've just got my tongue pierced and its given me loads of confidence and guys are more interested in me, not because i have a tongue piercing but because i'm so much happier now i stand out a bit more and my confidence shows.
Don't worry about your first kiss, you're 15, not 30! Anyways its better to keep it 'til that special someone comes along, just like your virginity.
Being 5'1 isn't too bad either, have you ever thought about seeing anyone younger? Not too much younger but i dunno a year younger maybe? If not i'm sure their must be some girls in your year who are same height or smaller if you're worried about being shorter than them. Taller girls sometimes like shorter guys too because its their personality that counts.
Try finding someone who could understand you and may have similar problems because we all have problems we want to talk about, just need to find the right person willing to listen.
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