A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello, aunts and uncles. Any advice or suggestions is well appreciated. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a few months. We have been becoming increasingly more intimate over the past few weeks. He is 21 and was, until tonight, a virgin. I, on the other hand, have had two previous partners. My first relationship, the actual sex was sort of whatever and never lasted long. I preferred being pleasured other ways. My second partner, the sex was really good. He was about average size, but boy oh boy he knew how to work it. It only happened a few times, but I got a little spoiled. My new boyfriend and I had sex for the first time just a few hours ago, lol. It wasn't horrible. Like i said, he was a virgin. He lasted awhile, but he had a bit of a problem getting hard. He didn't know how to put on the condom and was giggling. We were cracking up at his reaction to the box's instructions and because of it he wasn't getting hard. So, I started kissing him and stroking him to get him at full attention, but he didn't seem quite as hard as when I give him blow jobs. When we started, he just didn't feel as hard as I knew he could get and inside I was a bit worried, wondering if it were me. Was he just jittery and nervous? My room was also wayyyy too hot and we both were a wee bit uncomfortable because of the heat. Could nerves affect him?My boyfriend is also a little smaller than what I am accustomed to. Just slightly below average. I could feel him in me, entering, but he didn't go very deep and it felt a bit like a tease. However, we would get into a slow, hard rhythm and it did feel good, but he kept wanting to speed up and stroke more shallowly and I didn't feel very much. I guess I'm asking for some tips on positions and things to do to feel more of him and how to get him very, very excited so there will be no impotent moments, lol. Since he isles inexperienced, how can i suggest without sounding rude or like he isn't good enough?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2011): Time to bust out new positions! Although once he is less nervous he might be a bit harder and fill in a lil more, there are some great positions for hitting deeper. For one, try missionary but have him put your legs over his shoulders. Another good one is standard doggy style, or you laying on your stomach with your legs together and him coming in from above and behind. Also reverse cowgirl works really well imho. Try regular cowgirl as well, when you have the control it will be easier for you to figure out what angles and speeds and etc work best. You guys just have to have fun and experiment. Tell him where to go and what feels good- be open and vocal. Let him know when something feels good- it will help him learn and boost his confidence.
A
female
reader, sammy1986  +, writes (12 August 2011):
this was probably down to nerves but it it probably a good thing that he was a virgin when you met him as you can get him to do anything you want with him only being small i would try either him on top of you for the time being when you have had sex a few more times start experimenting with diffrent positions and see what feels good for you both sex is enjoyable just relax and have a laugh its not meant to be serious good luck
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A
male
reader, eek +, writes (12 August 2011):
 it was his first time. He was probably nervous give him time. Next time pamper him a bit so that he relaxes and is not nervous. Being new to it all he Will be open to ideas so if you want more stimulation get him to try oral on you before you have sex
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (12 August 2011):
 Poor guy! He was terrified and intimidated! I wouldn't judge his performance and adequacy of his organ on one night alone. I predict that within 6 weeks, he'll be the best sex you've ever had. Why do I predict this? Because -- he's a blank canvas when it comes to sex! You can guide him to move just like you like it, to kiss, just like you like it, and you'll take joy in giving him maximum pleasure as well!
It's not good to compare him to you previous partners, including your second one who spoiled you. If he were really that good, you'd still be with him. ;) But we tend to romanticize these things as the bad parts of him fade from our minds.
I echo the notion of giving your new guy time. He's just getting out the starting gate, and as you know, we were all awkward fumbling nervous gigglers once! I'm sure you were all love and patience with him too. I assure you that there will be wonderful payoffs!
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (12 August 2011):
 give it time.. he was nervous and it will improve. I prefer a slightly smaller guy because he can thrust harder and deeper and not "hit bottom"
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