A
female
age
41-50,
*elpme1
writes:Help my husband of ten years is not the same person. We fight almost everyday and a few times they have become physical in front of our two kids. He says it is all my fault and that if I was to change and get on some meds. that it would fix everything. He does nothing wrong he says it is all me. What can I do. Can this be fixed or am I fight a losing battle? In the ten years together he has never done anything like this before. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, hlskitten  +, writes (8 October 2008):
 Arrrgggg this isn't healthy for your children! Time out time out! Dont mean to be harsh and none of us are perfect, kids need to know we all disagree at times, but any violence that starts happening when there are kids in the mix, needs nipping in the bud quick smart, or you will start leaving a damaging scar. The saying its ALL your fault rings alarm bells. If you are both getting physical, its both your faults. It usually takes 2 to argue I always thought! Have you started getting Pmt? Are you snappy? I used to be a right cow every month, but we never got physical. Thats always my worst nightmare. I never witnessed it as a child, and wouldn't want my children to. My mum did. She stood between her mum and dad to stop him cracking a chair over her head. Not a sight children should see. It was different yrs ago, but its 2008 now.
Its hard to say what the solution is on a web site like this, but you need to get the violence out the house until you have resolved your differences. How you do that is your call.
C xxxxx
A
female
reader, Plain Jane  +, writes (8 October 2008):
 Since talking does not help much, perhaps you could email or write to him, say somthing like, you wish u cud make things back to your old romance days xxx ask him if he is undergoing any pressure xxx you still love him and hoping that he could talk to you xxx apologise to him ( even though you know he is wrong !! ) this cud make him feel good and he may realise it could be his fault to cause your sad.Hope this helps....
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A
female
reader, Gingirl +, writes (8 October 2008):
No one should be violently physical or mental. It sounds like he's telling you that you have a problem and you need to fix it. Are you in a relationship or not? You're married. For better or for worse. You need to get through it together. If he can't help you fix, both of your marriage, then it's time to say goodbye.
Feel free to message me.
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