A
female
age
36-40,
*adylove2010
writes: last month, I found out that my 68 year old husband was having an affair with a 25 year old female from a third world country. He was traveling back to his country several times a year. Little did i suspect that he had this lady living in his house. He confessed to having slept with her, but he tells me that he has no feelings for her. But, then why is he having such a hard time telling her to move out? He wants me to forgive him, and yet he wants to go back in two months. He tells me that he would rather go by himself. whenever I bring up what happens he gets very upset and tells me not to talk about it. Should I believe him that he has no feelings for her? by the way, he is best friends with the lady's father, and some of the lady's relatives also live in the house. could that be the reason that he does not want to tell her to move out over the phone? He never lied to me before. He even told me that he did not tell her that the relationship is over. what is he waiting for? Please, help me find the answer to this big mess.
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female
reader, Blonde68 +, writes (4 February 2011):
He has been living two lives without you knowing until now, and I guess it will continue as you are not allowed to visit the house. Basically he is just telling you what you want to hear.He won't stop seeing this girl because it won't make him look a good descent man, especially if he is friends with her father, and most of the family are living there.I believe that he has offered this young lady a good life and in return he is getting sex on tap. He sounds like a dirty old man to be honest... sorry.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2011): Honestly, I don't think this affair is over. He doesn't want to talk about, is having a hard time asking her to move out AND doesn't want you to go down there with him. That last point, is key.
If I were you, I would tell him that she has to go and insist that you travel there with him. But, I don't know your situation. Is that realistic? What are you willing to do if he keeps stalling on this? Are you willing to leave him and/or give him an ultimatum? Because it sounds like he likes having his women at both homes and has no reason to stop.
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