A
female
age
30-35,
*ostchick
writes:ok first off all i love my husband we've been together for two years, im 20 and he's 27. but lately he doesnt please me, he finish waay to early. im pretty sure he knows because he asks me if im mad. i dont know how to talk to him about this im sooo sad. please help me what should i do??? i mean im young and to be talking about this...ugh!! i really cant explain this sorry if its a little hard to understand i just cant say the exact words lol i mean i dont know how to talk to him about this. how should i start talking to him? i dont want to hurt him. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Candleman +, writes (20 October 2009):
 What Double M said is good stuff.
In order to work on this, you need to confront him about it. Do this in an understanding way. I would have him give you oral sex and others things that gives you an orgasm as you are working on this in order to keep his esteem higher. Don't expect this to happen over night. It takes time and patience and most of all communication and understanding.
There are methods of treatment. One is called the start and stop method. There are three stages in human sex response cycle. These are a. Arousal b. Plateau c. Orgasm.
Stimulation moves us along this path to reach orgasm. The goal is to be in the Plateau stage longer. The start and stop method is aimed at understanding when he is about to cum and then stopping. He can do other things to you to keep your arousal going while he is stopped.
This takes a mental understanding of when to stop. He'll probably go over a lot in the beginning, so your support is vital.
Also, Viagra has been known to help w/ this problem as well. Consult a doctor.
I heard a commercial the other day in reference to something called the Boston Method. I'm enclosing a link.
http://www.bostonmedicalgroup.com/the-boston-method/treatment-options
Best Regards
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2009): you just need to have lots of foreplay first so that you will be ready when he is ready. I bought a book on CD from ebay.com.au called Intimate Pleasure and it helped me out so much with my relationship. Kinda the same problem for me and it gives you heaps of ideas on what to do in your situation. You might want to have a look at it. Hope it helps. ;)
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (20 October 2009):
 Do not feel so far from normal. Although this kind of prob may not be usual at your age, it is very possible for various reasons. To cut to the chase, here are a couple of ways to possibly solve premature ejaculation.
1. Blow him off as a prelude. Young women today seem to be very willing to give blow jobs, and if acceptable for you, you could thus relieve his sexual tension and afterward enjoy a more extended foreplay (preferably including cunnilingus) followed by coitus as preferred. Precaution: While a preliminary blow job has always worked to get me motivated for more sex, it might put some guys out of commission.
2. Possibly a better solution: Require that your husband spend a good while devoting foreplay prior to intercourse. This is the main problem worldwide with sexual dissatisfaction among heterosexual women, i.e., that their men know little about stimulating women to orgasm. It is, or can be, an art. You could read some of my writings in the Web site's archives, such as Double M on female orgasm, or on G-spot massage, cunnilingus, climax. clitoris, clitoris complex or many other sexual topics. Hope my almost 50 years of experience may help, which is why I've contributed.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2009): Switch to condoms and buy extra thick or "pleasure control" ones. Or use a cock ring or something that constricts him a bit so he builds for longer. Anything that makes him less sensitive will do the trick!
Be honest. Tell him you're not happy but you have some ideas of what might work. Anything you suggest will probably sound kinky and fun to him! As it should be! Good luck!
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