A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:After my girlfriend and i got together, i got her a job at a bar i work at. during a short breakup, she had sex with a co worker of ours. We are back together but i hate seeing them interact on a daily basis. Is it wrong of me to ask her to quit her job and find another one else where to relieve this stress and insecurity?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2009): well i think it depends on how you feel. I don't see the big deal about moving jobs, you could get something better. She can apply anyway and there is no real contract saying she has to take the job once they've said they'd take her. She can tell them she's found somewhere else. I understand how you must be feeling and if it is a problem for you then i suggest you bring it up. How you feel about the situation could dig into your relationship. But on the other hand if she stays and you try hard enough, you might be able to have that relationship strengthend. I don't know, i understand Koenig's point, but in this sort of situation i think its the person who is uncomfortable that should get the bigger straw.
A
male
reader, koenig  +, writes (13 September 2009):
Yes, it is completely unreasonable. I understand why you feel uncomfortable, but her changing jobs isn't the solution. You need to realise that what you have with her is much more valuable than any one night stands she had. You also need to trust her fully - her quitting her job will just distract you from doing this.Also, think of it this way. If she felt that it was too confusing or conflicting to work with someone who she'd previously slept with on a casual basis, then she'd probably quit herself. If you ask her to quit, you'll be turning a small deal into a big deal.
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