A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello there. My girlfriend and I are together for more than one year now. I love her so much that I can't even tell you. Recently she met some guy and it is obvious that he likes her. She knows that but tells me not to worry. She says that she likes him as a friend but nothing more. Still it seems to me that she likes hanging out with him more than whit me. She sometimes goes to his place and they watch movies. She often doesn't tell it to me unless I call her in the middle of it. I am not a jealous guy but I feel that something is just not right. What am I to do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYou guys were right. She cheated on me. I know that because she told it to me when she was drunk and you know that the drunk people usualy tell the truth. She feels extremely bad and begs me to stay with her but at this point I just don't know what to do. Thank you all for your advice!
A
male
reader, chlez83  +, writes (3 January 2008):
As a guy handling a disappointment,i have to say you'd downnright dumb to sit back and think all's ok.You need to ask yourself why is she spending so much time with him.It's understandable if it's a friend she's known for ages.In your case,i strongly feel your girl's falling for him and wouldn't be surprised if he started sleeping with her and she slept with you less.Women have an inbuilt sense of loyalty and when you no longer see it,worry.Your girl is about to start cheating on you if not already.The earlier you step in,the better.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Whitestarr  +, writes (3 January 2008):
Try to tell her that you aren't happy with the situation... and tell her why.
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A
female
reader, kittycat_159  +, writes (2 January 2008):
 i think that she is being selfish and she is being inconsiderate of your feelings. you have told her how you feel and she has ignored that and she has continued to hang out with this boy. i think that she may be cheating on you. if this were the other way around and this was my boyfriend meeting someone else, i would have words with the other person. this person probably doesnt even know how you feel about them hanging out with your girlfriend.
i doubt that this is just a friend, otherwise she wouldnt lie to you. in my eyes, not telling someone something is just as bad as lying and you have said that she hasnt told you about meeting this boy unless you have blatantly caught her doing it.
if she loved you and respected you, she wouldn't make you feel this way and she wouldnt continue to see this person.
ask her whether this friendship is more important than your relationship.
hope ive helped
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A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse +, writes (2 January 2008):
 I'm not sure is my honest answer. If I were in your shoes I wouldn't be happy either... I don't think my girlfriend would be too happy if I did the same to her.
I would ask her, calmy without sparking up a row, that you're not happy with this situation and ask her how she would feel if the shoe were on the other foot.
If she says she wouldn't mind at all then I think something is amiss here. It's natural to feel jealous under these circumstances, I'm sure everyone here will agree.
As a last resort I'd suggest a "him or me" ultimatum and if she choses him then you know there's more to it than she's letting on... If there isn't more to it then she'll choose you.
Either way, you NEED to know where you stand. Be prepared for the worst though, or as prepared as you can be, but at the end of the day if she chooses to leave you then you'd be better off without her.
There's a difference between having friends of the opposite sex, and going over to their place to hang out and not tell your girlfriend/boyfriend.
Best of luck :)
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