A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi i dont' know whether the webiste is for this or notbut my father wont stop getting at me about my weight. am a british size 12 and he keeps calling me fat all the time and just staring at me and saying look at u. u need to do something about it. everytime i go to the kitchen to get something to eat for normal meals not for snacks he comments. ome times sayig u dont need that it will do u good. and he isn't doing it in a joky way.he stares at me wen i eat. and now i try not to eat wen he is about and i always go to the gym 3 or 4 times a week. and my mum starting to join in on the band wagon and its so hard, not to stop eating all together am fighting myself, to say i am just gonna give him what he wants if i stop eating. what do i do?i can't look at my self in mirror no more cause all i see is this fat ugly girl staring back. what do i do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, ninaballerina  +, writes (7 November 2010):
I'm 13 and my dad also calls me fat.. i always cry once im away from him when he says that im 158cm and 58kgs
(127 lbs)
A
female
reader, meganashley  +, writes (2 April 2010):
Hello,just 15 min ago my father barged into my room yelling at me on how i must have an eating problem like im a hog or somthing and he gets so angry he want to hit me a couple of times but my mother was there so he couldnt. but latley my mom has decided to call me fat also and as he stormed out of my room i quickly unpluged my tv and set it out in the dining room and was seriously considering trying balymia or however you spell it, but i know im to much of a fat ass to do that but there seems to me like there isnt any hope no matter how much encouragement you get,im 15 and 145 pounds ive never had a boy interested in me besides nerds that i didnt like back ,i was my life to be better, and after my dad left i heard my father saying that im going to end up a fat freak that will be alwasy a fat freak...since my grandmother died there is no one to console me or protect me or even lift my heart. i am so lost without her i write this to you with tears in my eyes.look at me , im sorry i really ment for this to be encourageing your story was so similar to mine i couldnt help expressing my life... and i dont think my parents understand not only am i a teenager whos in highschool ,that believe me i know im over wieght with all the really pretty girls in my school.. but i just wanted you to know ur not alone.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2008): I get what your saying my father has called me fat he says i getting fat and i feel heartbroken and stunned because i couldn't believe that someone i once looked up to tells me hurtful things and then he doesn't realize that it hurts my feeling and then sometimes i just want to punk him in his fucking face. if your feeling depressed about it this is what do i write down my feeling in my journal and i feel a little better or confront your father about his hurtful comments its better to get it out in the open. just keep fight on and don't stop eating just chose healthier foods and exercise daily do you play a sport? thats a good way to lose weight plus it is good to get your mother involved and remember that you losing weight isn't about your father its about you!!!!!!!!!!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2008): Hey first of all im going to tell you that you are NOT fat. The fact that you go to the gym three or four times a week means that you are a healthy anf fit girl. Maybe your Dad should be told by you in a calm voice "i am perfectly healthy and i wish you could just see that". Maybe if he really wants his answer go to the doctor, request a health check and then show the results to him. If you eat properly and go to the gym i dont see why you are not healthy. Size twelve is a great size for a girl to be. Dont let him tell you that you're fat as it will only make you go on crash diets which are not good. Hold your head up high and try your best to ignore him. Hope this helps and i know its easier said than done but your Dad is wrong to treat you like this.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2008): This could be because of a few problems...your dad could be just trying to help you, but not doing it in the right way. Maybe he feels that you are unhappy and it would help you if you lost weight. Or this could be the result of his own problems. Perhaps your dad is the one who is unhappy and he is taking it out on you. If this is the case, you do not have to settle for it. A size 12 is absolutely fine and there is nothing wrong with it. You should let your dad know that you are just fine with the way you are, so it doesn't really matter what he thinks. I personally cannot stand it when people do this type of things to their children because they don't seem to realize it is only hurting them, and usually causes more problems in the future, whether it is eating disorders, depression, ect.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2008): Size 12 is not fat. Try not to take on board what he is saying. Ask him why he is saying it. You don't have to believe everything people say - they sometimes want to hurt you because of their own problems.
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A
female
reader, leyan +, writes (3 January 2008):
 Hi dear,
Size 12 is not fat, so do not pay attention to the comments of your parents, it is sad, that some parents think by making fun of their child, they will motivate them to be better, while the reality is they are causing more damage, I had the same thing done to me by my dad, who I know loves me so much, but keeps on and on, playing on my self esteem when regarding to weight, and not only that, he even made me feel ugly and not worthy of a good man's love, just to get me to marry the man he wanted me to marry.
Please do not let them effect your self esteem, and Kittycat gave a good suggestion, talk to a family member, maybe when a third party talks to them, they will realise they are hurting you rather than helping you.
Good luck.
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female
reader, kittycat_159 +, writes (2 January 2008):
 Firstly, being a size 12 does not make you fat!! you are a healthy weight and you should be proud of your curves! your parents are very immature and although they are the ones that have the problem and they are upsetting you, it doesnt sound like they are going to change. They think that just by making fun of you, it will cause you to stop but what they are doing is damaging your self esteem and it could cause you so many problems in the future.
do you want to lose weight becasue of the grief that they are giving you, or do you genuinely want to do it for yourself? as it is impossible to ignore your parent's hurtful comments, i suggest you talk to a family member that you feel close to or a friend.
If you genuinely do want to lose weight, then continue going to the gym. Listen to music when you work out as i find that this really motivates me. Believe in yourself and dont let your parents bring you down.
They should appreciate and love you for who you are and they should not make you feel the way you do.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi
i have already opened up to them and tried to tell them how i feel and they never listen
they always say am jealous of my sister and stuff.
i do do weights at the gym, but wen i got there its with my mum and she constantly watches wat i do. so i don't feel like i am doing it for my self or wat machines i want to go on in the gym. like i love tthe elyptical but she says it does least for u so just use it as your warm up. but i cud be on there all day. and shes not exactly a skinny mini her self. I haven't eaten at all today.
i feel under so much pressure.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2008): Hi there, I had exactly the same problem and to be honest at the age of 26 I still have problems eating when I visit my parents. The problem is the cycle of guilt ur developing around food. I was a size 12/14 when the same comments were made about me. "little pickers, bigger knickers" was my father's favourite! Do YOU think you are fat? If so lose weight but only do it for yourself. The day I left home my relationship with food changed, funny how my parents never congratulated me on my weight loss but were happy to mention on gain throughout my teens?? I'm not sayng that moving home is the way out but I really couldnt find a solution while I was there.. If ur parents are stupid enough to call you fat they're obviously not inteligent enough to converse with! I tried and all it caused was arguements but I wouldn't say it wasnt worth a go! you sound a healthy weight and you work out - the problem is them NOT you!!
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