A
male
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend of one year who is fifteen year old feel disgusted when i have a boner. I get boner when i am around her and when she touch me even though she said she is not ready for sex. Is it wrong to have boner as she always tell me and that i am not a man if i don't stop having boner. How do i assure her that i am not thinking of having sex with her.
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female
reader, Dionee' +, writes (9 October 2022):
 To be involved with a minor is an issue. The last I checked, here in SA the legal age of consent is 16... Regardless, the golden rule is that any adult should NOT be dating anyone who's age starts with a 1. Since your age range is 18-21, I'm assuming you're around 18, at least that's what I'm hoping. Even so, it's inappropriate to be dating a girl this young. My advice: leave her alone.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2022): So you started seeing this 14year old as a girlfriend who could provide you with sexual arousal.
To put it bluntly you will end up on the sex offenders register and maybe in prison.
You are an adult and should not date a minor.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2022): Look at the hypocrisy of women. Everyone blaming the boy. Nobody says as a child she has no business dating an older boy. You should ask her whether she gets wet while kissing with you?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 October 2022): I'm actually disgusted reading this!
There is a reason that legal age limits for consent exist. Why are you, an 18-21 yr old dating a 15 year old? Find somebody your own age a d stop pressuring this young child to have sex. Yes that is what she is -a child! And that is what you're doing whether you intend to or not, you are displaying sexual advances and she is telling you loud and clear to stop! So stop!
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  +, writes (2 October 2022):
 Why are you, an adult, dating a child? OF COURSE she is disgusted and doesn't understand. She is A CHILD. Leave her alone and find someone of a more appropriate age to date.
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (2 October 2022):
 Of course she is disgusted by it, she is still a child, and you are a grown adult, and these conversations should not be happening with her.
Either wait a few years for her to mature and keep conversations around sex off limits, or go out and find someone your own age, or older.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2022): You're not being a gentleman. You think displaying yourself is a subtle way to get her to have sex with you, even though you say otherwise. She has told you she isn't ready, and being visibly aroused in-front of her like that is inappropriate.
Wear thicker pants or tighter underwear to keep yourself from showing. You can control it; but you're purposely exposing yourself, because you think she'll change her mind.
You're old enough to properly tuck yourself, and you're not some kind of pervert.
Wear an extra-pair of underpants! "Double-up," if you can't be civilized in-front of girls who tell you that you're not behaving like a mature-male. A real-man knows how to behave in-front of a woman who demands and deserves his respect.
It happens to most guys, and it's nothing to be ashamed of; but it's something you have to learn to control. Think of something distracting, or something gross. Don't wear pants that are too tight or revealing; until you can control yourself.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2022): I'm not sure what the laws are in your country about legal age for having sex but if you are 18 or older, I'd be VERY careful if I were you. Where I live Ohio, United States) legal age of consent is 16. It varies from state to state and where you and your girlfriend live, it could be anywhere from 14-17. I would HATE to see you get in trouble if she lied and said that you sexually assaulted her. I'd be her word against yours. Even if the charge doesn't make it to court it could still ruin your reputation.
Either way, if she's disgusted by a boner/erection and doesn't see it as a natural reaction you have little-to-no control over, she isn't mature enough for a boyfriend yet. Unless you're shoving it in her face or forcing her to touch it, she shouldn't be offended. But since she is, just tell her, "Sophia, I care for you but I don't think we're compatible. You're so not ready for sex that you're disgusted by erections - a natural reaction. I have no more control over that than you do your period. We have to break up. If you want to try dating again when you're ready, that's fine but until then I'm keeping my distance". That sucks, but you have to do that. It's not her fault she's disgusted (and probably afraid), but no, you're not wrong for having a boner. It's what you choose to do about it that might be wrong.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (1 October 2022):
 Sounds like your GF is VERY much still a CHILD who doesn't understand how the body works.
Date someone your own age..
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2022): Don't give a hoot what she thinks if she doesn't like it she can hop it.
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