A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend and i tie each other up during sex. I'm male and when she's fully bonded she loves me rubbing my penis along her body. She recently suggested her female bi sexual friend wants to join in. I am very open to the idea but they wont tell me what they want me to do to them. What shall i do?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (28 February 2010):
Decline. What this really means is your girlfriend fancies her and wants to have her cake and eat it. You'll be the one who gets hurt.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2010): If they are asking for it, they should be willing to have a complete conversation with you to negotiate the event.
If they will not, pass on this... it's likely going to be a huge mess... if they will:
You need to have a frank and clear conversation at least a week before any play. You need to be able to process the conversation and seek clarity from your GF and the third party. Talk to your GF about "what ifs" - what if you become jealous, what if she does? What are the rules for you with the third party? Her? What acts are forbidden? When you come, where? who do you ask? will penetration be allowed?
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A
female
reader, followtheblackrabbit  +, writes (28 February 2010):
 Well, you really need more information first. I totally agree with that. There are things they might want to do that you are not comfortable with and vice versa. They might want to make a sexy surprise and that's understandable, so just gently/jokingly be like, "That threesome idea is really sexy, especially with you girls, but uh, I don't think I'd ever go for this or that." That way, your girlfriend can be up to date on things you don't want to do and still manage to keep a few, sexy surprises. She too can inform you on the things she does not want happening.
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