| A ,
*oker_05
writes: Have been seeing a girl for three months now. I do care for her, although there's not much physical attraction on my behalf towards her any more. To be honest, she's becoming very clingy towards me and I don't particularly want to take things further with her. However she has a friend who I have fancied ever since I laid eyes on her. She's everything I could want in a girl. I'm getting mixed signals from this girl, sometimes she can be sweet towards me, but other times acts very cold. Without hurting anyone I would really like to get with her but it's difficult with my current 'girl' in the way. How can I be sure that her friend likes me - I think she does, but perhaps she's playing it down for her friend's sake. Please help. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, robinlovescena +, writes (20 June 2005):
 i suggest that you break it of with this girl. talk to her with respect. dont say something like its not you, its me type of stuff. talk to her in a mature way. communication is the only way to go. she may even feel the same way, but you must talk to her about it to find out the truth. after it is over with her, i would ask her if she would support you if you were to ever to ask your friend out. if you did not ask her first, then you could ruin the friendship between you and her,, and her and her firend that you want to go out with. then if she approves, ask her friend out. it may even be the best decision that you have ever made. good luck~Robin~aka advice gurl
A
reader, NordicBeauty +, writes (20 June 2005):
My answer to you is plain & simple.You're a naughty boy who wants his cake & eat it too !Your present girlfriend is being clingy because she SENSES your attraction to her friend...women have built in Radar.Obviously you do not care for her very much, if you desire to dump her and pursue her friend.You would not only break her heart ONCE, but TWICE.She would lose you & then lose her close friend, too."the grass always looks greener on the other side."You are attracted to her friend but cannot have her.Perhaps she is cold towards you sometimes, because she knows you are attracted to her & she's protecting her friend by pushing you away.Fools rush in where Angels fear to tread.Tread carefully & be wise, or you will suffer the consequences by bringing pain & heartache to all involved.
...............................
A
reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (19 June 2005):
 Okay, this is quite simple really. You shouldn't be with the girl you are with and you aren't being fair on her at all. You care about her but you aren't physically attracted to her and you fancy her friend! What a recipe for someone getting hurt!
It really doesn't matter at this point in time about the other girl, you need to deal with the issue of letting your girlfriend down gently now. If you don't, you are going to hurt her sooner rather than later. If you don't want to take things further with her, why are you still with her? Are you frightened of hurting her or frightened of ending up on your own?
It is time to break it off with her. Luckily you haven't been together too long so hopefully she will recover quite quickly. Don't drag it out and don't mention her friend. Leave time after breaking up with your girlfriend to even think about approaching her friend. She wouldn't be much of a friend if she went with you while you were still with your girlfriend anyway. Could you respect a girl like that?
Be honest and be fair. Break it off with your girlfriend and do it gently. Let the waters settle before you think of getting to know someone else.
...............................
|
