A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:This is probably an unusual question but I need help with it so please bear with meI've been with my girlfriend for nearly 4 years, and this has been a problem for about the last 2 and a half, we cannot seem to resolve it.She watches way too much porn. I found out about it when I saw her internet browser history, and there was a lot of porn, mostly gay male porn, as well as some individual photographs of men with their genitals out and posing and all of that...I love her a lot but this makes me feel very worried. These men... they are in very good physical shape and very "well-endowed", it makes me feel insecure about myself. I am NOT a small man, I have a good 8" when erect, but these men are up to 13, 14 inches, and I worry that I am not enough to please her. Why does she need to look at this stuff, when she has a real guy sitting right here? It doesn't really interfere with our sex life, we still have sex a lot, but she looks at porn every day, and masturbates to it (we don't live together).She has told me not to worry, that those men are "just fantasies" but it doesn't do much to help me feel better. She says she will try and watch "less" porn, but she hasn't stopped. She has lots of magazines and DVDs as well. I don't think she is addicted to it, but I know that she really enjoys it...I personally don't watch porn anymore, I used to watch it in my teen years (I think all teenage boys do), but as I got older I grew bored of it, all the women look the same, and the acting is terrible and tacky, it just doesn't turn me on at all... I wish she felt the same, but she has totally bought into the whole porn-standard ideal...I can never measure up to that.What do I do?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2008): man guys aint 13 or 14, thats just fake. only worry iff your gf starts sugessting stuff u not into, or ifyou think she is playing away. i had a gf who did start checkinporn and yes size did come upas did black. ot of women got this fantasy. we discussed it a bit, her trying big guys and did itturn me on etc (which it did to some extet). we talked different stuff and then hired a well hung black escort guy for her with me watching and i was allowed a female escort in return which she not wanna watch but did choose with me. be craful if youtry anything similar
A
male
reader, SamuraiRick +, writes (8 March 2008):
 Dude, most men would love to have your problem. Thing is its mostly women that complain about their men on porn, but here you are complaining in the reverse!
Being 8 inches yourself is more than adquate and you should already know that, so why are you down on yourself? Her thing with looking at other guys is pure fantasy....accept it and get over it. What you could do is help her out with her big-dick fantasy and get her a nice over-sized toy to use when you play together. But let's be real, she's banging you and that's all that matters.
If you don't like what she's doing, give her up and find someone else. There plenty of woman that don't like porn.
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A
male
reader, Paladin +, writes (8 March 2008):
 Drop it. Why would you care about what she watches if she is loyal to you. That's the real question. If she is then let her have her fun. if she were communicating with these people or meeting with them then you definitly have issues. sounds like you two have a good relationship and that should be all that matters. If you get a chance listen to the song "Behind Closed Doors" by Charlie Rich.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2008): She's probably going through the same mental process that you went through in your earlier years. Remember those huge tits that you used to wank over? Same thing, except that she's looking at huge dicks. 14"? You've got to be kidding. Unless she's looking at donkeys no man has anything that big! And even if they did, what good would it be? They'd only be able to use less than half of it before she started to choke!
Let her have her fantasy - it can only improve things for you in the bedroom department.
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A
female
reader, asian tealeaf  +, writes (8 March 2008):
 dear sir, women love men who are confident. key word here. i watch porn occasoionally, and i love gay porn its a turn on for many women, as lesbian porn is for men. although men are the more squeimish when it comes to knowing girls like watching guys get their donut punched. my bf loves to almost a fault watching anal porn, and it REALLY makes my stomach turn knowing he loves watching women get it in their ass. i was for the longest time uncomfortable about him and his porn, and so we talked about it, because i happen to be a super super horny girl and im extrmly attracted to him and yet he was having more handparties then fucking me.not that im not hot. and, i always felt intimidated by his porn because i thought thats what he wished i would do. either way, man or woman, fantasy is what it is. and i admire u immensely because u dont watch porn or not as much, i also think u need to understand, women physically dont get as nice a view of the actual penetration during sex, believe me. its not really all that fun when u feel it but have to twist and turn ur neck or body to gety a decent view. men on the other hand get to see the penetration and all, so porn helps to catch all the hot viewings we girls miss out on, etc, and as u know, masturbations a little different then sex. vibrators etc are awesome, and a mans dick just cant do what a pocket rocket can. but, dont lose hope! i think u should watch it with her, be the silent one and find out tactfully what turns her on when she watches porn, maybe get into the mix by using the pocket rocket on her, and let her use it on u. believe me, its a totally awesome feeling feeling the vibrations on ur chode while banging her, or putting the pock. rocket inside her pussy and then banging her and feeling her juices and the vibrations rock against ur dick.
once u have figured out what she loves about porn, then slowly get away from it, maybe make ur own porn, inside ur private settings, and both of u can watch it together, and experiment. as long as it does not entail bringing others into the mix, its all good. and yes, u can measure up to the porn dudes. u have watched it before u kniow what porn entails, so u bring the porn star out of ur closet and into her bedrm. trust me. she just might love u even more for it. and maybe wean off a little from the porn viewing. but the more stink u make about it, the more sneaky she will get. trust me. guys are the same way as u know. u dont want her being sneaky aboyt porn. so use ur mind tact. and dont feel too threatened. good luck my dear friend. and thumbs up to u because i respect guys who are not really into porn. i wish there could be more men in this world who realized u can get it all with the real thing. porns just a farce. a fake outlet for men who dont have much else to do in their lives. and women to be fair.
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