A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Okay so im only 19. I have been with my 32 year old fiance, matthew now for 4 years. We have always had the most amazing, honest, loving relationship you could imagine, we were planning to get married in 2013. We have the most beautiful little girl in the world. Ella whos 14 months old, and a bump, things couldnt of been happier. About a month ago, matt found out he had a rare form of cancer which was growing and they pretty much told us that and no treatment would ever cure this, this was and is the most heartbreaking thing ive ever had to hear. Doctors have told us he has months to live, matt seems to be dealing with it, we speak about it quite abit, i just want everything to be perfect before and after anything happens. He told me the only thing he wants is to give me his name and to meet our new precious life (i recently found out im pregnant), and to make me the happiest girl alive, we have brought the wedding forward to valentines day and my parents are paying all costs to make the day extra special, i know im going to be the luckiest girl in the world. I know its going to be difficult and i cant bare the thought of him not laid stroking my face first thing on a morning, or running out in my dressing gown at 7 o clock in a morning to put the bin out because we forgot the night before. Lol. Were celebrating christmas in lapland this year (just wish it could be the four of us, but thdres only ever gonna be three) weve got no choice but to come to terms with things, i know me and my babies will have the most amazing memories of the most amazing man ever and im lucky enough to have two little copies of him. I just sort of wanted to offload i guess. Tell the whole world how perfect he is. And ask for any advice off of anyone who has or knows someone whos been in a situation like this. How i can make his time the best. Ideas of ways to keep special memories of him. And advice on how to live without him with two babies who dont understand. Thankyou to anyone who can offer any. This site is so wonderful, as are you people, Stacey x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2010): with the disclaimer that *I'm not a doctor*, please before you give up... look into Gerson therapy for him... I've heard of people being put back on their feet from seemingly hopeless situations by following this regimen, it is a difficult and strict regimen, but there are testimonies from many people that it has saved their lives from impossible cancers...
A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (3 December 2010):
 I am so sorry... this question just breaks my heart, but I´m still glad that you came to us for help.
I hope I don´t sound insensitive, but I would like to know if you have gotten a second opinion? When it comes to medical issues, always get a second or even third opinion. I´m not close to the situation and I don´t want to give you false hope, but doctors can be wrong. I think that you should seek a second opinion if you haven´t already, because what have you got to lose?
Make the most of every second you have with your family and live your life every day in such a way that you can look back and say that you made the most of your time with him, and not hve any regrets. Be there for him, to show him love and to listen to him and comfort him when he needs you. Take loads of pictures and videos, and go on special trips together. Focus on the joy he brings into your life now and make the most of your time together. Try not to spend too much time thinking about his illness.
I hope this helps. Don´t forget, we´re here to listen to you.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek  +, writes (3 December 2010):
 I'm so sorry for you sweetie. This has to be so very distressing for both of you. The best thing you can do is to enjoy the time that you have. Show your man how much you love him, be there for him, laugh. Live every moment to the fullest. Make beautiful sweet happy memories. Get a video recorder and record anything and everything so that your children will be able to know their father. It doesn't matter what you record, later it will be beautiful treasures. Take lots of pictures, make takes and have him talk to his children (and you). Record the two of you together talking to the children. Do anything and everything you can together, so that when the time comes, you can look back and say "I made our time together very special and precious." I know this isn't quite the same thing, but when I found out my beloved grandmother had bladder cancer, this is what her and I did. We talked and talked and talked about everything. We got all of the "When you die" part out of the way, and just spent time together. I felt happy that at least I had time to prepare. I knew the time was short, but at least it wasn't a complete shock. I hope I don't sound callous, I'm just expressing what I felt. Please just enjoy every precious moment, make him feel happy and loved, and see to his comfort. Don't think about the future to the point that you can't enjoy the present. I hope that helps. Good luck sweetie.
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A
female
reader, soontobe  +, writes (3 December 2010):
Ahh heartbreaking question, you are in my thoughts, You can videotape some special videos for your two chilren with him talking to them say for graduation day ,future marriages etc so he can still be part of their lives in a special way. Just make his last months special and be with him as much as you can. Try not to make every day about the cancer just make it for him. Good luck and bless you.
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