A
female
age
36-40,
*abrinaH552
writes:I've been with my fiancee for 2 years, the wedding's off due to COVID but we've been together for 5 years as a couple.She's a great girl, lovely, kind, helpful, always has some project on the go here.Sex is the big issue. It's not that she doesn't want sex (far from it!!) but the amount of time it takes to get to having sex.She drank 6 bottles of Diet Coke, ate 4 tubs of Pringles, 3 Hershey's candy bars, then 4 packets of Skittles, then 5 packets of M and M's "just to get things moving before sex" and she's been doing this every single time.It's only happened in the last four weeks so is new behavior.She said to me she's done this to try and psych himself ready for sex, she finds it difficult to get out of being stuck in "Zoom mode" (her contract ends soon, so she won't have to work from home) or "project mode" (when she's working on her own or DIY around the house).She's a good lover, takes my needs into account over her own. Why would she need to eat this much before sex and it take so long just to get to sex doing it?I've asked her but she finds it difficult to explain why she does this, but we can normally discuss most other things.Our relationship's good in general, I'm just wondering why she does this.I doubt it's anything fetishistic, though, she's said that's not a reason why.How would you cope if you were in my situation?Need some advice here.
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male
reader, GregoFranco +, writes (20 December 2021):
I'm in fear of fat shaming or whatever but that's a lot of food and I assume you have a fat fetish the way you describe so casually. It's going to get worse twice as fast as it would with a normal person. I say normal because eating all that shit before sex is abnormal. So if the fetish is that important, stop complaining and get ready for it to get a lot worse.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2021): Anyone who knows anything about nutrition would be horrified at the diet of your woman. It is so so unhealthy as well as far too many calories. She may feel she needs a sugar rush before she gets stuck in. In the meantime she will give herself diabetes 2, maybe cancer and maybe other illnesses if she continues like this. That should be worrying you, and her lack of common sense should, far more than your sex life.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2021): Erm...okay, you say she is a good lover because she 'prioritises' your needs over her own.
And to 'psych herself up' for that, after what sounds like incredibly stressful online work, she has to try to de-stress beforehand by the only reliable form of comfort she can find - food.
My suggestion? Try having sex where you do NOT prioritise your needs and only prioritise hers. She will stop the eating very soon after that, pretty much guaranteed.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2021): Thats a lot shes consuming all at once.i advice you keep tabs on her and see".
Like kenny said professional help needed!
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A
male
reader, kenny  +, writes (19 December 2021):
 The amount of food that you describe that she eats is a huge amount of food, you say she say's this is to get her moving before sex. I'm not sure eating all that food would get anyone moving to be honest, infact quite the opposite, this would make most people sick.
As this, as far as you know is something that has only been happening recently i would say that this is an eating disorder that should be addressed by someone professional.
does she consume all this food then spend quite a long time in the bathroom?. It is possible she could have bulimia
Either way eating this amount of food is not healthy, especially taking into consideration the type of food it is as well, a hugely high sugar content.
I feel you should keep your eye on this for a week or two, and if you think its getting progressively worse then she may require professional help.
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A
male
reader, DarrellGood +, writes (19 December 2021):
 Ever considered diabetes? Your finance ever been tested? Im just noticing there is a lot of sugar rush items there. If someone is doing something like this it then it tends to indicate either physiological or psychological compensation for something that is missing. Im not a doctor and my opinion counts for nothing medical wise but on first glance that is what this suggests to me. Dont be down on her, she probably doesnt even know why she does it herself but its worth further investigation because you never know when something that is underlying is going to cause problems later down the line. Good luck.
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