A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i have been married for 3 years and have two beautiful children. I'm 26 and my wife is 21 and we got married young, well my wife feels she was too young. My marriage is falling apart and i feel I'm losing my wife and the family that i have built.In the beginning of our marriage she was dependent on me and was taking care of our kids but know that she found a job and has a car, she feels more independent and sees no need for me. Her interest now is only on having fun and going out late. I'm so hurt so i turn to alcohol and even though i hate and wish to stop. I need to know how to get my wife back? I want that fire that we had to grow again? Anyone who can pray please do for me and my family!! Any woman that have advice for me of how they got through a young marriage and had kids young? Please i would be very grateful.. thank you for your reply!!! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, jd0230 +, writes (8 May 2009):
Honestly, i dont have much advice, and it probably wont be useful at all, but my husband is 26 and im 20. I married young as well so i see where she is coming from. The only thing is, i dont have children yet. I believe she feels like she hasnt experienced herself enough, especially with having children. Have you tried finding someone to watch the kids and take her out. Or do something different that neither of you have experienced? She probably just feels too tied down even though she loves you with all of her heart. As for your drinking....Your family needs you and now is not the time to fall apart. If you look at the big picture, its as if you are being quite selfish because of your pain. Your kids need you and so does your wife, whether or not you believe that. She is being selfish as well. It's going to be a really hard process!! Patience is the key. I will pray for you and her. She is the only one that can change this. I hope things get better for you! Just whatever you do, do not stop showing your love. God bless!
A
female
reader, mrs.smith81608 +, writes (8 May 2009):
I married young too (the first time). I'm so sorry to hear things are going so badly for your young family. My advice is this, suggest time for the two of you to occupy her wanting that free time. If you've stopped doing the things that woo'ed her when you first began your relationship before the marriage, start back. Remember you got to still keep the girl once you get the girl. Speaking from a woman's point of view, do simple romantic things. No you don't have to ooze romance 24/7 but make some effort if you're not already, ok? All else fails, suggest counseling. She may not see a problem, tell her there is and you both need the help. There's nothing wrong with therapy-in fact my present husband and myself are fixing to start. I'm not going to let my marriage now fail without a fight.
I hope you are able to get the help you need. Good luck!
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