A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I have been dating my boyfriend for about 2 years but we've been best friends ever since we were 2 years old. so i need help....i cant stand living here with my family anymore. it seems like they care about my brother more...i can never trust them about anything anymore...i wanted to tell them about my relationship with this guy but they just kept yellin at me for dating him because hes not their type.. i love him so much for the past 2 years we have only had a maximum of 2 fights..he is the sweetest guy ever. he loves me and cares me so much and i know he would never cheat..plus my parents say hes not cute, hes stupid, and retarded., well hes not bc hes got all HIGH classes, hes in the marching band, hes sweet, sure he may not be "really cute" but hes perfect to me and now tht my parents found out im dating him they want me to move on and to not see him anymore....THE LOVE OF MY LIFE...., so im tired of never them understanding me, never them supporting me so i think its time i move into his house(my parents even said to me "idc if u walk outta this house, u can go if u want...nobodies stopoing u"... so today im thinking about moving out..but am i doing the right thing??
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Sahara z  +, writes (17 December 2011):
Hi,
Ok, i'm a parent of children 21 - 11 and I've not been on this site for a while but yours was first one I saw today and it struck a chord with me so I feel I have to try to answer...
Firstly, as hard as it is for you to understand your parents will only have your best interests at heart. They may well appear to you to not listen to you or understand but it comes down to an age thing really. You are young and feel what you feel which is one thing but your parents would of at some stage either gone through the same feelings for someone as you feel for this boy or they would have witnessed friends etc make mistakes and get hurt or miss out on other things in life like college,uni, travel etc. Thats not to say they are right about what they think of this young man but it is maybe what they fear for your future and want to protect you from. You are 'young' and maybe quite simply they are concerned that you are getting too involved at such a young age and in their eyes not keeping your options open.
I would advise you against moving out. That is very drastic and trust me it won't improve your relationship with your parents and will make them dislike this chap even more.
My own daughter did something simular at 18 and it was more the lies and deciet that caused the biggest problems. We knew of the guy (a druggie) and at the time she was only texting him so it seemed inocent and she had a lovely boyfriend who we adored. We told her what we thought of the druggie guy and expressed our concerns she claimed he was only a friend, then moved out behind our back, then went around telling everyone that we had thrown her out. My husband and I have gone through two years of hell and our daughter is now back home but she has lost many friends and some things will never be the same.
Please be patient. Talk to your parents about how you feel. But try to be mature enough to listen to what they say and at least reassure them that you understand their points. Be open and honest with them about how you feel without ranting or shouting. You may well be surprised how in time their opinions might change.
Christmas time is a family time please don't punish them by moving out
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