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My ex won't stop calling. I want to respond but it hurts too much! What do I do??

Tagged as: Breaking up, Dating, The ex-factor, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (17 May 2008) 3 Answers - (Newest, 17 May 2008)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

My ex is moving across country for a job. He said he just wants to be friends---so I am trying to honor that request. No email, text, call, etc. He keeps doing all of that and doesn't understand that it hurts me too much to keep in contact during this time.

What do I do? He just won't stop. I even went to him and said lets give this another chance and he said no. I love him more than anything and I'm frustrated, sad, mad....just about every emotion.

Any advice?

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A female reader, Aunt Audrey United Kingdom +, writes (17 May 2008):

Aunt Audrey agony auntThe easy answer to this is that you have to be blunt and tell him straight NO MORE CONTACT !!!!! Don't answer his calss, txt messages or emails...IGNORE HIM

You are in a situation that you want him back, but he's moved on and wants different things in his life. There's nothing wrong with remaining friends with an ex, but you must give yourself time to get over him and have moved on enough emotionally to deal with having contact again.

Tell him he may hear from you again, but only when you are no longer emotionally tied to him.

Staying in contact with him when you are obviously still in love with him, especially when he's made it clear he wants out of the relationship, will only lead to heartache. Don't let him hold your heart hostage, break the ties and move on maybe you can be friends at a later stage in your life.

Good luck.x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2008):

Thanks for asking the question. Sailing in the same boat myself.... He's been with his new girlfriend for 2 years.

We're friends, he calls (I can't because of his new lady) we talk, he comes round, we hug (strictly friends) he goes home to be with her... I cry, and cry, and cry....

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A female reader, Stayc63088 United States +, writes (17 May 2008):

Stayc63088 agony auntHe still wants you in his life he just doesn't want to be in a relationship with you. Let him know you are not ready for a friendship at this time and you need a little while to get over it. Tell him you 2 will be friends later but for now you need time away and no talking at all to help move on. I understand where you are at and it is impossible to get over someone when you are still talking to them everyday. Good luck.

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