A
female
age
36-40,
*mbarr
writes:I'm in desperate need of advice! My ex, we still talk a little. He's in a class with me, so it's kind of hard to avoid him. While we were dating I told him about how my family likes to do a lot of decorations for Halloween. Well, he wants to come by the house to see the decorations but I get the feeling he doesn't want to just drive by. I think he wants to come inside. My family always has a party with friends and family over so if he tried to come in it would be fairly easy. He's not a very subtle man so if he hints at something he hints at it big time. I really don't want him there though, and in case he does decide to come over what do I do? If I tell him before hand I don't want him there, how do I say it?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Karlos Omnis  +, writes (29 October 2007):
 If you don't put him in his place (i.e. telling him point blank where he stands) that he'll keep attempting to push the boundaries.
A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (29 October 2007):
 Let him know there's nothing to stop him driving PAST if that's what he wants to do but that the party is strictly for FAMILY ONLY. It may be that this is his way of trying to get back with you so you need to nip it in the bud right away and let him know that you're not interested in him any more so let him know that.
Eve
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A
male
reader, TomWilkinson +, writes (29 October 2007):
 Since you are no longer together, you're more than entitled to say, "It's family only, sorry". He has no right to argue with this, and if he does or pushed further you're well within your place to simply say you'd rather he wasn't there
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