A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hey everyone i just would like your opinions on a situation.I'll give a bit of background info.. Me and my ex split up in june last year it was a real bad break up and i thought it was all my fault as id slept with someone whist we had split up (a previous break up i thought was for good) anyway he said he could never forgive me and i turned into like a crazy ex.. begging, crying etc. However he finally told me he was just fed up with our relationship and he used it as an excuse to end it..Over the months i have moved on, although i miss him sometimes it no longer gets to me that we arnt together.. My ex has got a new gf and the last time we spoke just before xmas he told me he never wanted to speak to me again, he hated me and that his new gf was miles better than me..I was a lil upset about that as he was really awful to me verbally and i lost loads of confidence..Last weekend i went out with some friends and was having a great time until one friend text and said she had bumped into my ex.. Whist in the nightclub me and my ex bumped into each other but didnt speak.The whole night he kept staring over at me and he went up to one of my friends and kissed her cheek (not so bad except he really dislikes this friend of mine and would never usually dream of speaking to her never mind pecking her cheek) and he started showing them pics sayin 'look at my new gf, isnt she stunning etc'The whole he's got a gf thing doesnt bother me, its just why would he show his new gf off to my friends and stare at me all night and come dance near me??I didnt react and just ignored him, i just wonder do you think maybe he was trying to make me jelous and trying to get a reaction out of me and if so did i do the right thing by doing nothing or should have spoke to him ..Sorry for the long post but i would really appriciate your advice mainly from a guys point of view..Thanks xx
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confidence, my ex, split up, text Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhey,Thanks for all your answers, they confirmed what i thought.. Guess i just thought it was wierd cause he was the one who broke up with me and is supposed to hate me so shouldn't all the staring and stuff be the other way round!Some people i will never get lol.xx
A
female
reader, Gena Bullock  +, writes (25 March 2008):
 Boy, he is so immature it stinks.......
Don't fall into his games; he's just trying to pluck your nerves. Let it go and go on with your life. He's using his GF (who, by the way...where was she that night???) to abuse the situation, that's all. My ex does me the same way...he's (oddly enough) dating my boyfriends exwife as though we swapped partners! How sick is that? He went to a different state to find her and bring her back to the same state we live in now...so, he obviously is insecure and wants to stay connected to me, so this is his way of doing so. Doesn't bother us in the least; however, it is rather sick. Same as with you and him using mutual friends to fire you up...don't fall into his trap. Smile and move on, baby. You got bigger fish to fry! Gena
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2008): He sounds like a wounded animal. Maybe he is lashing out because he feels extremely hurt by you. Of course, this isn't your problem, and he eventually will think it through and get over it. You should ignore him in the meantime, and understand he has some healing he needs to go through before he will be a reasonable person again.
People react to things differently, most times, we hash through images and react uncontrollably because we don't know how to deal with it. Communication is always the key, and when things wrong, it is because communication failed at some point.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (25 March 2008):
 I agree with all three aunts. I have to add that his comment about his new girlfriend being "miles" better than you means nothing. One person finds you bad and another will find you unbearably good. It's just a matter of personal likes and dislikes. Don't take that seriously.
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A
female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (25 March 2008):
Sounds to me he def wanted to get your attention! You did the right thing by ignoring him. Once he realises that he cant get a reaction out of you then he will stop. Whether or not he still likes you, I don't know. He could be one of those very bitter people who hold a grudge against their ex's forever.
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A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (25 March 2008):
 Hi,
I would say he is far from over you. He finds the need to constantly try to make you aware that he has moved on, when in fact if he hasn't. I would agree with the other poster and say ignore him. He will get tired eventually of trying to get you to jump up and take notice. He is obviously bitter.
Dont worry and take care.
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