A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So basically I went out with this guy two years ago - we'd been friends for a year or so before that. I have to admit that I wasn't CRAZY about him and I'd just got out of a really long relationship so it was half for rebound but needless to say we got on really really well and we had some really fun times together. Anyway he got pretty into it (probably because I was kinda aloof with him) and eventually after a couple of months I couldn't take the guilt so I broke up with him. He was pretty cut up about it and didn't speak to me for months, even after he started dating one of my close friends (who asked my permission by the way, and I felt I had no reason to oppose it since I was never that keen and maybe he'd start being friends with me once he realised his relationship with her is better than with me).They've been together for a year and a half now and we made up about a year ago so all was well, we contined being friends. However when we drink together he gets kinda nostalgic and sad and I don't really know what to say. The other night we were chatting about it and he basically came out and said that he loved me more than his current girlfriend, and that he lives in hope that we'll get back together in the future. He said that he can't bear to think about me with anyone else and that whenever he sees me he wants to kiss me etc. What the heck do I do? I obviously didn't return his sentiments but I can barely look my friend in the eye even though I technically didn't do anything.
View related questions:
broke up, get back together Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (14 January 2013):
 You need to go No Contact with him after you tell him that there is no shot in hell you two will be together.
He's holding on with the hope you will be his again. He may only be dating your friend to be close to you.. (which BTW is NOT your fault but your GF may find it that way if he breaks up with her)
You need to tell him that you no longer can be friends with him since he is harboring false hope and you don't wish to hurt him or your GF.
and you need to let your gf know that you no longer wish contact with him. Sadly she will want to know why... and maybe (and if other aunts disagree I bow to their judgement on this) you should tell her that she needs to ask him. And he needs to be honest with her...(and you need to let him know in your last conversation that you will be referring her to him for an explanation and since your allegiance is to your gf not your ex, if she comes back to you and asks after he talks to her , you WILL TELL HER THE TRUTH)
this is a mess
and this is totally and completely a great reason why we should NOT be FRIENDS with our ex partners. Friendly yes. Civil yes... FRIENDS NO.
A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse +, writes (14 January 2013):
 Just tell him you're not interested and it's over between you two. Easy. Then cut all contact. If he phones you and you answer (because you didn't know it was him) just tell him you're busy and hang up.
...............................
A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (14 January 2013):
You never actually said if you told him the truth: that you feel nothing for him.
Until you've done that there's nothing else to say.
...............................
|
