A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Hi I was with my ex for a few months. Then we split up but he said he still liked me afterwards and we did sexual things together. He messed me around basically. Soon after we would do something toegther he woudn't want to do anything and woudn't act close with me. Now he says he doesn't like me anymore. He has said he used me. But might be saying that to make me think he doesn't like me?. I still love him and want him to think of everything we've done together so it makes him realise. Ive started saying I dont fancy him anymore too see if he treats me any different and so he doesn't think he has me wrapped round his little finger. I'd like some help on what to do please? thanks . Im 14 by the way
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female
reader, bubbloo24  +, writes (31 July 2007):
 You're worth more than that!!!
I understand how you feel, I've been in a simliar situation and believe me, that kinda thing makes the break up a whole lot more difficult.
Rule one of breaking up is no sex with the ex.
Visualise a train, put him onto this train and watch it fade into the distance. It's time to move on. You don't want to be in a relationship like that.
I know you still love him but you have to realise that the way he treated you was awful and that he is not worth you being upset at all.
Look in the mirror and say "this guy isn't worth my tears and he's definatly not going to get the better of me.I'm a beautiful young girl with my whole life ahead of me. The one I will be with will treat me with respect and will be the one who's worth ALL my tears but will not make me cry."
In a few months you'll look back and say " Why was I so down? he was an assh*le."
Trust me, I'm a person who got through it and you'll be telling someone else how to deal with it soon :)
Take care and message me if you like :)
xx
A
female
reader, penta  +, writes (31 July 2007):
 Oh hon, guys don't think like we do, and you've just learned it the hard way. They don't need closeness for sex. They don't even have to like you to want to use your body. You won't be able to get him to like you if you do sexual things for him; he'll just let you do it then go back to being a jerk to you.
A guy either likes you or he doesn't. Any guy worth ANYTHING won't do this to you. Your ex is so not worth it. There are MUCH better guys out there.
Please stay away from your ex. Believe him when he says he was using you. Let your heart heal and you'll find a guy who's worth you. Work on things that boost your confidence -- join a sport or a club. Self-confidence is sexy; neediness really isn't. You'll find when you're feeling really good about who you are that you'll attract the right kind of guy. And the guy who's worth it will wait until you're ready for those sexual things. (And when it's with a guy who treats you right, it's more fun.)
Good luck.
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