A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello, i was just wondering if anyone could offer me any advise as to if its possible to get my ex back.We have been together 4 years and im not just saying it but we had the best relationship. we were best friends aswell as anything and had everything in common. we knew what each other was thinking etc. anyways, my ex had recently turned 21 and just before he had finished me because i had lost my engagement ring.. i know he must of been hurt just as i was but i was devastated too. he would text me everyday. he invited my round on his birthday although we had split up and it was like old times.one week after his birthday he decided to go out with another girl. (just 3 weeks after breaking up with me) he didnt know her and they have been together a month and already are moving in together. we had said some nasty stuff to each other when i found out and now he just ignores me all together. are my chances with him over?
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female
reader, MaryB  +, writes (28 January 2011):
I'm sorry that you are going through this but, you need to look at this realistically. How do you know for sure he didn't know her before he hooked up with her- because he told you that? I know this isn't what you want to hear but, even though they didn't start seeing each other until after you two broke up I have a feeling he had his eye on her before. He has moved on way too fast. I also, suspect that spending time with you on his birthday was just a way to keep you on the hook until he was sure things were going to work out with this other girl.
I am sure he was upset that you lost your engagement ring but, possibly not for the same reason you are thinking. It appears that he used that incident as an easy exit. What ever the reason, you are placing too much importance on that-know one breaks up with someone they truely love because they lost a piece of jewelry which could alway be replaced. I know this must be devastating to you to say the least after being together for 4 yr. & it may not seem like it to you at the moment but, maybe he did you a favor by ending it. For someone to end a long term relationship & move on so quickly with someone else says a lot about his character. In the beginning it's easy to think about all the good things you two shared but, I'm sure if you step back & think about things a little more clearly you will see that things weren't possibly as great as you imagined. I'm also, not saying that things will not turn around for you in the future with him although, I wouldn't hold on to that thought. Do you really want to be with someone who can walk away so easily with out a second thought for your feelings? If you two were to get back together could you ever fully trust him again? Start thinking about yourself,not him- you are still young & have many years ahead of you to find a man who will love & cherish you for the wonderful person that you are. You deserve to be happy & unfortunately, I don't believe this guy fits the bill. Take care!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2011): Losing your engagement ring is a pretty big deal, but if he really loved you and wanted to be with you forever, he wouldn't have broken up with you over it. It seems to me that maybe he was just looking for an excuse to end things. If he had felt about you like he should have, then he wouldn't have moved on so quickly or easily. I don't think he's coming back, but after the way he's treated you, do you really want him to? I'm sorry things didn't work out, but I think you will find someone else who will treat you alot better.
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