A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So its been about 6 months that me and my ex broke up from our 3 and half year relationship. We started talking and hanging out about 2 months ago.. I found out she started going out with this guy about a month or 2 after our break, what hurts is I don't know if this guy is a rebound. I mentioned it if he is to her and she denys it and its a long distance relationship.So I started hitting on her again for bad intentions but like after a while I started to notice qualities that I've noticed and I kind of started falling for her again.. she knows I like her a bit and everytime we hang out I started getting really close to her, like I hold her while watching tv, I kiss her on her forebears many times and attempted to kiss her, but she says she can't and doesn't wanna cheat, she always blushes and smiles when I do all those things. But now the boyfriend is back for winter break and it really hurts because I feel he's her first priority, but obviously I understand. It's just lately I've been having trouble keeping her outta my mind and trying to date again, like before we started talking again, I dated and hooked up with some people but now I don't even want that anymore.. I want her but she told me she doesn't wanna go back to our relationship because there is so much pain and hurt.. idk what to do anymore.. I need adviceCan anyone tell me how this will turn out or did anyone go through the same thing and would like to tell me there story on how it turned out and how did the story end?? Btw we broke up once a year ago for 4 months.
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (20 December 2011):
 He is her first priority now. She does not want to be with you in a relationship. She is your friend now and nothing else. She is with this other guy now and she wants to make things work with him now, so you need to accept that now and move on. I know that it is hard to move forward from such a break up but you need to accept that the relationship is over and there is no going back, you need to see that she does not want to be with you any more and accept it. I know it is hard but it will get better. I think the best way to get over her is to stop contacting her.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2011): She is telling you she doesn't want to go back to being in a relationship with you, and she has a man who she is putting first and will not cheat on (which is a great thing). I don't think he is s a rebound thing, but only she knows that for sure. Believe her when she says she doesn't want to go back to being in a relationship with you, she has moved on and I think you should do the same, I know how much it hurts and how hard it is to do, but I don't see the story ending with you 2 back together. It seems to me it will end with you being more heartbroken than you already are. Good Luck.
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A
male
reader, LovelessAct1 +, writes (20 December 2011):
Been in a similar situation. The ex and I started getting really really close again over the summer, even though she was somewhat seeing someone else. My advice: get out now.
Seriously, you'll save yourself a load of pain. As of now, she's enjoying the attention/friendship you give her without the hassle of actually being in a relationship. The second you want things back to the way they were, she'll get scared off and make some excuse about not comitting. If you value and respect yourself, you'll keep your dignity.
If you must, lay it down for her. Tell her that you still have feelings for her and want her back. If she fumbles around, says she's still with this guy, or isn't sure, that's your que to leave. Trust me, you don't want to continue being used and let on, only to find out that she doesn't want a relationship with you and just values your friendship. It hurts like hell.
I may sound biased, but I'm just passing along my experience from the same situation. Obviously, I don't know your ex nor do I understand your relationship. But if I could go back and remake some decisions in my own life, I would avoid this scenario altogether. best of luck.
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