A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Basically since my ex-girlfriend cheated on me repeatedly its hard for me to trust my girlfriend Im with now. My girlfriend now of five months is having an old friend of hers who she had sex with before come up to our job to see her. This is really bothering me, for one she just sprung it on me out of nowhere, and for two I dont trust her or the guy. I dont know what to do or think. We got in an argument last night about it and she started trippin and defending him. Do have a right to be mad about it? What should I do?
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female
reader, huneygyrl +, writes (4 January 2009):
Discussing the issue amongst yourselves. Communication is one the keys in a relationship.
Your past shouldn't dictate your present and future. Just because your ex cheated on you doesn't mean she will. Trusting someone in another relationship is hard especially when your ex cheated on you numerous of times.
A
female
reader, Jmo +, writes (3 January 2009):
Would you still be defensive if she was not talking to someone else? I'm not saying you have no right to be concerned, but if she has not done anything wrong you owe it to yourself and her to give her the benefit of the doubt. If you keep holding on to the resentment of your past relationship you will never move on. Ask her about the guy. Does she seem elusive, or does she tell you everything? Girls can have platonic relationships.
My advice is just to talk to her. Tell her how this has affected you. Tell her that you feel hurt. Ask her what she thinks you should feel about this (that always gets 'em). Seriously, just speak.
-Jmo
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