A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:About 4 months ago I broke up with an ex boyfriend and then a got together with another boy... me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 months and I think my Ex is stalking me because he always calls me follows me, emails me and when he calls me we always fight cause he'll ask me why I don't love him and I should break up with the boy I with right now.I don't know how many time I told him that it's over I never loved him and he needs to just forget about me but he just keeps bothering me (I am a little bit scared that when I see him again he might try to hurt me and I don't want to get a restraining order on him.What should I do about this?
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broke up, my ex, stalking Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2009): jessiacas response hits the nail on the head, unfortunately you will have to report him. I am in the same aituation so I can sympathise.
all the best x
A
female
reader, jessica04 +, writes (5 March 2009):
 Listen to DrPsych. You need to stop talking to this guy. Get records from your phone company of his calls, print his emails, and keep a diary that logs times he finds you in public.
Make this all known to your local authorities. The sooner you tell them and keep them updated, the better they will be able to help you if things get worse.
If he doesn't get the hint when you stop answering his calls and emails, then you must file a restraining order. It is your only real form of legal action. If he violates that restraining order, you will have a court date set. Hopefully it doesn't get that drastic.
Good luck, keep us posted!
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A
female
reader, kaylagal +, writes (5 March 2009):
 Stalking is a serious thing, women get killed by stalkers. Warn him once, if he continues take further action - report him, file a restraining order against him. Don't feel sorry for him.
A co-worker harrassed me a few years ago, even tried to follow me home. I was naive and didn't want to get him into trouble so I went thru it, until I told a co-worker and they reported him. In hindsight, I should have reported him at the first offense.
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A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (4 March 2009):
 Stalking is a very serious matter. However, by continuing to speak to him and 'reason' with him you risk his obsessive behaviour continuing and unwittingly (in his mind) courting his attentions. My advice to you would be to block his number on your phone, or don't accept his calls. Don't answer his emails but keep them as evidence for the police. When you see him out in your community ignore him. If the behaviour persists, it is important that you contact the police - if they have a 'word' he may leave you alone. Stalking is a criminal matter and you should take your personal safety very seriously indeed. I was stalked several years ago and it took moving home & changing phone numbers to finally resolve the issue.
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