A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My ex boyfriend has just told me over instant messenger, that his mother is dying. How should i deal with this. I don't want to sound callous, but i didnt really understand why he felt the need to tell me. We haven't spoken for over a year. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, flower girl +, writes (16 June 2007):
 My husbands grand dad has just died and we have been separated for ten months now and he has a new women in his life but he chose to phone and tell me first and ask me to go to the funeral with him.
Ok you have not spoken for a year but i'm sure there is enough feeling left there for you to offer him support through this very tough time maybe he has no-one else that he feels he can really open up to.
Take care.x.x
A
male
reader, Wild Thaing  +, writes (16 June 2007):
 If he were a friend would you even have doubts about what you would do?
Would you react with hesitation if some person you never knew walked up to you and told you her mother was dying?
You must do what your gut tells you to do, and take responsibility for the consequences that follow from making that choice. Good luck and take care.
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (16 June 2007):
 He's going through a very traumatic time just now and needs as much support as he can get. He's just reaching out to anyone he knows that will listen, it's a devastating thing to happen in his life, it doesn't mean he wants to get back with you, it just means he wants a listening ear. Let him know how sorry you are to hear about his mum and talk to him about her. I'm sure he'd appreciate any reassurance and support you can give him at this time.
Eve
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A
female
reader, deejuliet  +, writes (16 June 2007):
 He is reaching out to you in his pain because he still feels a connection to you and needs your sympathy and support. Often when something is bad in our life we turn back to old loves. It is hard to say really why. Maybe for some validation. I know when my marriage was falling apart I searched on the internet and reconnected with several old (I mean from high school and college and I was 37 at the time) boyfriends and friends. If you can find it in your heart to give him a small amount of your time and support you will be doing him a great service.
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