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My divorce comes through in a month and I'm starting to feel deeply for my friend, but my husband wants to work things out!

Tagged as: Cheating, Marriage problems<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 January 2006) 2 Answers - (Newest, 10 January 2006)
A female , anonymous writes:

After 8 years of marriage and a 3 year old daughter, my husband out of the "hell he was living in". After 5 straight days in bed crying, he came into the bedroom and told me to get up and get on with my life. I did just that.

That same evening a friend that I had been working with for over a year came into town. After a few drinks, I found myself in his arms. Since that time, we have seen each other as often as possible when he comes into town...at least 3 or 4 times a month. We have developed a great relationship and I am really starting to develop stong feelings for him. He is 14 years older than me, married with 3 children.

This weekend, my husband (which I am not legally divorced from for another month) told me he was unhappy separated and wanted us to work things out. I have a feeling a lot of his unhappiness comes from financial constraints on him because of our pending divorce. I have several questions and am in desperate need of advice...Should I give my husband another try even though we have not had feelings for each other in several years? Should I try and ignore the stong feelings that I have for the other man that has come into my life? I know the stats on an affair working out, but is there any possibility one might work with this other man?

View related questions: affair, divorce

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2006):

Do people who post here not understand the meaning of "commitment"? I don't understand. It confuses me.

You promised to be with your husband FOREVER, and there's a kid in the mix whose life is going to be MAJORLY affected if you follow through on breaking that promise.

Nobody ever said you had to like your spouse all the time. Being in love is a feeling; love itself is an act.

Drop the affair and work things out with your husband.

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A female reader, Dawnest +, writes (9 January 2006):

You do have feelings for your husband otherwise you wouldnt be agonising about whether to give the man another chance.

The new man is rebound feelings and after 8 weeks of getting together, it will end and you will move onto someone else.

Follow your inner voice and do what it is telling you because if u want to try with hubby again, give it a go with your eyes wide open.

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